My Brain Blog

Pictures of Chanda Through the Years

2008-07-01T06:55:00.006-04:00

Chanda, Ronnalda (Ronni), and Deidra

Friends at Chanda's going-away party given by Deidra Dukes

Loren, Kimball, Michelle (Shelli), Chanda at Abrams Family Reunion 2005

Chanda and god-son Michael

?, Chanda, and Melonie (Mel) in Orlando

Chanda 2007

Obsequies for Chanda Nicole Taylor Today at 1 p.m.

2008-07-01T06:30:00.003-04:00

Dear Family, Friends, and Blogger,

As you may know, Chanda succumbed to her illness on Thursday, June 26, 2008. My mother and I are immensely saddened by this development, but take great comfort in knowing that Chanda lived a beautiful life. Chanda would have been 36 on July 7, 2008; however, I knew in my heart that she was going to leave us at 35.

We are so amazed for the tremendous outpouring of love and support that we have received from so many people and cannot put into words just how grateful we are!

I feel like I am operating in slow motion, as I know that Chanda is gone, but I am having difficulty really grasping the magnitude of what that means. I got up around 5:05am as I was unable to rest once again.

If anyone is local and able to come by the service, Chanda will lie in-state at First Iconium Baptist Church beginning at 11:30am, and then the funeral is at 1:00pm. The church is located at 542 Moreland Avenue SE, Atlanta, GA 30316. Afterwards, the burial is at Holly Hill in

Mommy and I love every part of Chanda! Our minds are flooded with so many memories of us as a family from being a big tattle tale in elementary school to being cheerleaders together in high school to visiting her in Orlando. It is all so overwhelming.

http://www.roscoejenkinsfuneralhome.com/index.cfm
http://www.ajc.com/metro/content/metro/obits/stories/2008/06/30/chandra_taylor_cnn_obit.html

Sincerly yours,

Loren A. Taylor
Bereaved Big Sister

Update on Chanda

2008-05-26T07:25:00.004-04:00

I just want to take a moment to thank everyone who has been calling, texting, and emailing Mommy and me about Chanda's progress with her journey to recovery. I am sorry that I have not blogged on her behalf in such a long time, but I have felt so exhausted and bedraggled by the entire recovery process!

Chanda is currently undergoing another course of oral chemotherapy, different from the Temador that was initially prescribed. She is currently in a rehabilitation center in Atlanta where she is getting limited physical, occupational, and speech therapies to aid in restoring Chanda to full capacity.

The month of May is almost gone and it feels to us like it lasted for a moment and an eternity...if anyone knows how that is. Let's look back...we flew back early from Orlando because something was obviously very wrong.

After arriving back to Atlanta, we took the Duke doctors' directives and drove straight to Grady Memorial in Atlanta from Hartsville-Jackson airport. Next, we went through a fiasco at Grady emergency, and I would have gone completely nuts if Chanda's trusty pal Kevin Trigg had not kept me company and gotten us some food during the extended, unnecessary wait. At first they were being extremely strict about the rule of only letting one person come back in the emergency department with the patient. Somehow, Mommy (as always) worked it out, and I got to eventually come back around 2 a.m. Chanda had the emergency surgery to remove the cerebral hematoma around 11 a.m. on that Sunday morning of 27 April. The surgical team finished up Chanda's surgery around 3 p.m.; however, we did not see Chanda again until nearly 10 p.m. (yet another long story of inconsideration and bureaucracy).

After maybe 3 days of torture with the ICU at Grady, we got word that the Duke Brain Center had arranged a medical flight from Peachtree-DeKalb airport to Durham where Chanda was hospitalized there just better than a couple of weeks. They allowed Mommy to fly up with her. Next, the ambulance brought Chanda and Mommy back to Atlanta to the rehab facility.

Pray for our strength, particularly Chanda's, first and foremost! Chanda has been through such a tremendous struggle since that day back in November 2007. I hope that you will all unite with us and let our hearts, minds, spirits as we pray for Chanda's healing and deliverance from this afflicting brain cancer. Pray that she will be restored the Lord Christ Jesus. Join us in reading the book of Psalms for Chanda. Also ready the following verses and incorporate them in your prayers this week!

Mark 16:17-18And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover."

Psalm 31:24Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the Lord.

Again, much thanks to ALL of you for your continued prayers and well-wishes. Right now, Chanda is on such a rigorous schedule that she is unable to have visitors at the hospital, but we look forward to having an amazing testimony and celebration.

We also appreciate all of your interest in what is going on with Chanda, but sometimes it is a little overwhelming to recapitulate the details over and over ad nauseum. Some days, I have no energy after talking on the phone with friends and family that mean well, as this whole thing with dealing with an illness is familiar (e.g. Daddy's, Aunt Betty's, Audrey's (Satterwhite), Aunt Louise, and several other close cousins and family friends); however, it is somehow totally different and foreign.

Somehow we have all been tricked into thinking that cancer and extended illnesses behave and subscribe to some manageable formula much like trigonometry. What I mean is that people misperceive that you get diagnosed with cancer; then you get radiation, maybe through in a course of chemotherapy;then you go into remission; and now you are miraculously cured forever...lickity-split...dust your hands off, DONE! That is completely not how it goes. Cancer wages war, a world war...a life's battle. In between the rigorous schedule of methodically taking medications, going to doctor's appointments, receiving treatments, getting testing, going through hospitalizations, suffering set backs, celebrating victories, a lot of things that no one talks about occurs and that is the story. That essentially is the reason for this blog in the first place.

I apologize to Chanda for not having the strength and tenacity to clickity-clank out this journal daily, but I will make an effort to do better.

Lastly, I apologize for typing up such a rambling journal entry; however I am in quite a hurry to fit in everything that I must do today, most importantly getting up to the hospital to visit Chanda and to give Mommy a break.

Loren
Big Sister

Faith, Trust, and Hope

2008-05-02T03:33:00.003-04:00

For all of Chanda's blogging pals, I just wanted to update you on what is going on since it has been a week since she last blogged. As you have read, Chanda has been progressing marvelously and increasing her activities significantly working up to going back to work and getting back into a daily grind of sorts.

Chanda's former boss, Bob Jordan, was so gracious and thoughtful as to offer up his pool house as lodging and provided plane tickets for Chanda, Mommy, and I (Loren) to get some much needed rest and relaxation in the Florida sun. Chanda was absolutely stoked and geared up and ready for the trip to Orlando particularly after speaking to Bob last Wednesday afternoon.

We all participated in the typical ritual of running around like chickens to get washed and packed, but Chanda seemed to be having a somewhat insignificant loss for words on Thursday. It was only things like saying "clicker" instead of wireless card or "calculator" instead of Blackberry/Blackjack, and so forth.

We arose at 3:30am on Friday to leave home by 4:30am so that we could drop off the car and take the shuttle over to the airport. Mommy and I both were a bit troubled by how sleepy and sluggish Chanda was, but she was bound and determined to see all of her friends from the station in Orlando and thank Bob for his hospitality.

Once in Orlando, Chanda was not fairing as well and she had begun dragging her right foot and having a difficult time lifting her legs, which we initially attributed to her increased dosage of Decadron. We contacted the brain tumor center team at Duke to keep them abreast of what was happening and to get further instruction of what to do. By night fall, Chanda was completely zapped and she was just absolutely lethargic.

Bob was disappointed that Chanda was too pooped to socialize, but we figured things would improve in the morning. Unfortunately, this was quite the contrary...Chanda's condition worstened. We somehow helped Chanda to get dressed and by now, Saturday morning, her legs were beyond heavy and it was a feat to get her out of the pool house and by the pool lounge chairs.

Bob had finished making his famous eggs, and we didn't have the heart to tell him that Chanda does not eat eggs, so she bravely shoveled some into her mouth and ate a respectable amount of breakfast. Just so that she would perk up a bit more, I gave her some more fruit and fixed some cheese grits while Bob took his sassy pooch Toto for her grooming.

In about two more hours, maybe at 11am, we noticed that Chanda was becoming unresponsive, and I called the Duke answering service. The intern from the brain tumor center gave me a buzz back and we determined that we needed to return to Atlanta immediately, and he advised me to get her off the plane and to Grady Hospital immediately upon landing back in Atlanta.

With Bob's help, we got to the airport on Saturday afternoon, leaving Orlando about 30 hours ahead of the original schedule, and got Chanda to Grady.

Once we played the exorbitantly long wait in the Grady ER, a CT scan revealed that Chanda had a Cerebral Hematoma and would require emergency surgery at Grady. Roughly 15 long hours after arriving at Grady, the surgical team operated for 4 hours to remove the clots. In a few hours after the surgery, the doctors felt that her condition had stablized.

After a couple of days at Grady, the Duke neurosurgical team got it approved and arranged for transport to Duke via a private medical jet that flew Chanda with Mommy from Peachtree-Dekalb Airport to Durham, NC.

Chanda is slowly improving; however, keep in mind that this process of getting well is a long and trying journey with many bumps in the road! Keep Chanda, Mommy, and I in your prayers and ask God to restore Chanda fully and allow be an inspiration to others where they are battling cancer or merely overcoming life's obstacles and objections! Keep the faith and trust that God will do what he promised when we pray. Hope for many wonderful memories to come.

I love all of your for supporting us, and I will thank you in advance for allowing us time to get situated as we work on getting Chanda well, and also keeping ourselves healthy too.

With great love and appreciation,

Loren
Chanda's Big Sissie

FUN FRIDAY

2008-04-18T16:33:00.001-04:00

I'm just getting back home after a full day of fun. I had lunch with my friend Anissa. She's new to Atlanta and an anchor/reporter at my old station WSB/Channel 2. We met six years ago through the National Association of Black Journalists Anissa, her husband, and three kids just moved here from Mobile. It's great to have another talented journalists and friend in Atlanta.

After lunch, I browsed a bit in Barnes and Noble and bought some stationery then Loren and Mommy met me and I watched them eat lunch.

I had planned to sigh up for the YMCA today but that may have to wait until Monday. Dr. Friedman wants me to start doing water aerobics so the plan is to go three times a week to start. I think I can handle that.

I'll try to update the blog this weekend bu it may not happen til Monday. Oh, before I go, a shout out to my brain tumor friend Lisa. She had a MRI scheduled today and I pray everything will show the tumor is still gone!!

Love to all,
Chanda

I'M BACK IN GEORGIA (UPDATED)

2008-04-16T08:49:00.003-04:00

Mommy and I made it back to Newnan around 10:45 last night. We were delayed because we stopped in Greenville, South Carolina to visit my great aunt Jessie who's 93 years old. She's getting forgetful but she remembere my mother of course. Aunt Jessie's children are my mother's double cousins. Aunt Jessie was my grandfather's youngest sister, and her husband Uncle Fletcher was my grandmother's brother. To break it down further, my grandmother Cleora was the sister of Fletcher who was married to Jessie who was my grandfather Joseph's sister. Confused? Yeah, everybody else is too.

Aunt Jessie remembered me too through my father. She was crazy about him and when I told her I was Harold's daughter that was good enough for her.

Anyway, about my doctor's visit, it went well. Dr. Friedman was pleased with my progress. He said I was healing like a 16 year old! Considering I'm nearly 36 that's great! I'll go back to Duke to see the doctors at the Brain Tumor Center in May. That's when they'll do an MRI to make sure the tumor isn't growing again. Of course, we're all prayerful that's not the case.

That's the latest and greatet with me. I hope you have a great hump day!

Love to all,
Chanda

SOMEWHERE IN NORTH CAROLINA

2008-04-14T18:48:00.002-04:00

We're somewhe in North Carolina north of Charlotte but not quite to Durham. Kinda of middle of nowhere USA. I think I told y'all earlier I have an appointment tomorrow with Dr. Allan Friedman, the neurosurgeoon who performed the brain surgery on me six weeks ago. This is the six week follow up and I'm praying that all is going well. I've felt fine so I pray that's a good sign.

We should make it to Durham and our hotel around 8:00 or 8:30 tonight. The appointment tomorrow is at 10:30 am so that means I can sleep in a bit. If all goes well with the appointment, we'll be back on the road by 1:00 pm tomorrow. This is our first road trip to Duke so I'll let you know tomorrow if we plan to do it again. I personally prefer to fly and leave the heavy lifting to someone else. But Mommy thinks driving is more economical. We're saving receipts and we'll let you know.

Love to all,
Chanda

HEAVY LOADS

2008-04-12T10:18:00.003-04:00

"The load may be heavy but it's the weight that makes you stronger."

This is a quote my friend Serge says all the time and it's so true. I've learned over the past few months, especially, that when you're facing situations that seem overwhelming, tackling the problems actually make you a stronger, better person in the long run. It's hard to see it that way sometimes but it's so true!

So remember when life is beating you up, put your dukes up and fight back and remember you're getting stronger with each punch.

Love to all,
Chanda

HIGH AND DRY (SKIN)

2008-04-11T09:53:00.003-04:00

Well we made it to Friday. Today I'm going to get a hair cut to even out my so-called hairstyle. It's not a style at all. It's just hair that's grown haphazardly all over my head. Hopefully this haircut will make it a little more presentable.

My legs are feeling better today. My left leg had been sore all week but it's finally feeling normal. Now I'm dealing with a dry skin problem. My skin is peeling all over. I went to get a body scrub earlier this week and that helped a bit. I'll go to the dermatologist if the problem doesn't improve soon. My sister asked her dermatologist about my problem and she gave me some Eucerin lotion to use. We'll see if that does the trick.

One final note, a lot of you tell me you're reading the blog but I don't get a lot of messages. If you haven't left a message, please do so, so I'll know you're here.

Love to all,
Chanda

“He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.”- 1 Peter 2:24

HAPPY HUMP DAY

2008-04-09T08:48:00.003-04:00

Good morning,
I'm up and kind of at 'em this morning. I feel good but not ready to do much. I have to look over my Bible study soon because I haven't prepared myself for the lesson today. I'm going to keep my head tucked down in class today so hopefully the teacher doesn't call on me! I sound like I'm in third grade, huh? So, yes, I have Bible study today. I don't have any other plans. I may have lunch with a friend if we can connect. But, thankfully no doctor's appointments.

Everybody have a great hump day and we'll talk tomorrow.

Love to all,
Chanda

Philippians 4:11
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.

SLEPT LATE

2008-04-08T10:13:00.002-04:00

I slept late today, not intentionally though. I woke up around 9:15 though I should have been up by 8:30 to take my medications. Oh well. I had a full day yesterday. Loren and I were in Buckhead yesterday morning by 8:30. She had a doctor's appointment. We then went to the spa where I had a body scrub and massage. Very relaxing! We had lunch after that and ended up meeting up with our cousin Lakala. We didn't get back home until after 5pm so it was a long day but I didn't feel tired. It feels good to be out and about and somewhat normal.

Today I'm not planning any such pursuits. I have a few errands to run but that's about it. No need to push it. My legs are a little sore still but other than that I have no complaints. I did get a headache yesterday. It was nothing serious but I let Loren and Mommy know and I will let my doctor know as well. I don't want to shrug it off but I don't want to make a big deal of it either because I will get headaches. It probably was not a big deal but I'll make sure.

That's all I have to report today. I hope you have a great day!

Love to all,
Chanda

HAPPY MONDAY

2008-04-07T05:47:00.004-04:00

I got great reviews yesterday from my church members after I testified before altar call. I'm glad I did a good job. I really just want everyone to know that I know to GIVE GOD THE GLORY for healing me of this awful tumor. I know the doctors do the work but they're working THROUGH God.

This morning I'm up early I guess because I fell asleep early. It's 5:50 am right now. I was going to get up at 6:15 anyway because I'm going to an early doctor's appointment with Loren then she's going to take me to a massage appointment. I guess we'll run errands from there. Though it's mighty early, I feel rested. I'll also have a chance to rest during the massage later today.

I hope everyone has a great day. I know some of you are on spring break so enjoy.

Love to all,
Chanda

Matthew 14:29-31

29 "Come," he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus.
30But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"
31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"

BIG DAY

2008-04-06T08:54:00.002-04:00

It's a big day for me. This morning I'm going to testify in front of the congregation before altar call. Rev. McDonald asked me to do it when I was ready and I've been ready. I'm anxious to share my story of healing and survival with everyone! So, please keep me in your prayers if you're reading this in the morning. I've written some notes of course to keep myself on track. I'm OK speaking in public so everything should be OK.

I continue to feel good. My legs are a bit tired but I had heard from another GBM patient that that would be the case as I continue to take Decadron (steroid). Dr. Henderson reduced the dosage last week and I haven't experienced any ill effects. I hope to be completely off of it soon.
In the meantime, I hope Mom and I can go for a walk today. We've been off schedule because of all the rain.

Love to all
Chanda

Psalm 150:6
Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD.

FRIDAY UPDATE

2008-04-04T09:13:00.002-04:00

So today is Friday. I don't have any planned activities though I'm considering getting a massage today. My shoulders are pretty tight and that's not a good thing. I don' need that tension in my body. I have been avoiding hot baths because I'm going through a spurt where my skin is EXTREMELY dry. I mean really, really, really dry. I use Gold Bond lotion which works but excessive baths and showers only make it worse. I'm probably sharing too much.... I'll move on.

Today I feel pretty good. I ate breakfast already including a cup of decaf. I hadn't really been drinking coffee but Loren made some yesterday and it really woke up my taste buds so I made a pot this morning. The main thing I've been drinking is ginger tea. It acts as a digestive aid. It really helps if you have indigestion which happens sometimes as a result of some of the medications I take.

Fortunately, I've been sleeping better because my doctor has eased up on the steroid I'm taking. I was taking one dose at 8:30 pm which wasn't helping my sleep schedule. The steroid keeps you awake at night. Now that I'm only taking the steroid in the morning, I'm sleeping much more soundly.

Well, that's the latest and greatest with me. I may not update the blog again until Monday depending on what plans I have this weekend.

Love to all,
Chanda

I'M BACK

2008-04-03T15:26:00.002-04:00

Sorry it's been a few days since I've blogged. Tuesday was a busy day for me. I went to a doctor''s appointment for myself then one for my mom. Then, I went to a meeting of the Atlanta Association of Black Journalists then to dinner with two of my friends, Deidra and Angela. I didn't get home until about midnight so the next day I was pooped. I hadn't hung out like that in ages and my body simply wasn't used to it. Yesterday I spent a good part of the day in the bed.

Anyway, I'm no worse for the wear. I feel fine. My legs continue to feel weak at times, but they'll strengthen eventually.

Today, I haven't done much. I'm just continuing to rest and build up my strength.

Love to all,
Chanda

HAPPY MONDAY

2008-03-31T09:25:00.002-04:00

It's Monday and I'm in a slight hurry. My friend Vanessa and her mother Mary are on the way here for lunch. I've got to get ready for their visit. I'm excited because I haven't seen Vanessa since I left Orlando back in August.

Vanessa has been so supportive since my diagnosis. Actually supportive doesn't begin to tell you how much she's done not just for me but for Loren and Mommy in helping us deal with everything. Vanessa is a breast cancer survivor and now head of a non -profit that helps survivors. She's a wonderful advocate!

So let me go roll out the red carpet and I'll holla at y'all tomorrow!

Love to all,
Chanda

RAISING AWARENESS AND MONEY

2008-03-28T23:24:00.002-04:00

Good evening everyone:
There's an organization called the Southeastern Brain Tumor Foundation that sponsors a 5K/2K race at Atlantic Station in Atlanta coming up this summer. The race raises awareness and funds for brain tumor research, as the group's name suggests. Here's a link to their website: http://www.sbtf.org/sbtfrace.html

The race is in July but I want to start building a team now to show Atlanta we mean business about raising awarness about brain tumors! My goal is 100 people on Team Chanda. WE CAN DO IT!

I have to contact the organization to get more information about registration fees, etc. I'll pass along that info as soon as I get it. So, please, if you're in metro Atlanta, pencil in July 21 for the race. I'm so excited!

Have a great weekend,
Chanda

Isaiah 53:5
But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

CHEMO ROUND #3

2008-03-27T08:12:00.002-04:00

Ding Ding.... Chemo Round #3 starts tonight. The mail order pharmacy called yesterday and said I'd get the shipment this afternoon. Fortunately, this type of chemo doesn't cause hair loss, which is good because my hair is slowly growing back from the loss to radiation. I do sometimes get nauseous from the Temodar, which is the name of my chemo, but I pray I'll continue to tolerate it well overall.

Otherwise, I continue to feel good. Sometimes my legs feel a little wobbly and weak but I've found walking actually helps make me feel stronger. Yesterday, Mommy and I went for a nice walk and the weather was GORGEOUS! Being out in the sun really helps rejuvenate me. We'll be out for another walk today but as of yet the sun has not made an appearance.

Happy Thursday!
Chanda

Psalm 62:7
In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.

MORE CHEMO ON THE WAY

2008-03-25T08:49:00.002-04:00

I'm preparing for an appointment with my oncologist in about an hour. I'll be starting a new round of chemo soon. He'll prescribe it today so I just have to wait for the mail order pharmacy to fill the order. Even though the tumor is gone (PRAISE GOD!) the doctors still want me to follow up with chemo to make sure all the cancer cells are dead, dead, dead!!! Later, we'll be using a different kind of chemo to keep my body guessing and further kill those cancer cells.

I only have to take the chemo pills for five days in a row so the regimen isn't that hard on me. Last month I tolerated it really well and didn't get nauseous or anything.

After my doctor's appointment, I'm planning to go for a walk. I didn't walk yesterday because it was really cold. Plus, Mommy and I were gone a good chunk of the day. I went with her to a doctor's appointment then we wernt to lunch. By the time we made it home, I took a nap then she was napping when I woke up. Oh well, we'll pick up our new routine today.

It's time to get ready for my doctor's appointment. I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow.

Love to all,
Chanda

Jeremiah 17:14
Heal me, O LORD, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise.

HAPPY MONDAY

2008-03-24T08:34:00.002-04:00

It's been three weeks since my surgery and I'm continuing to improve everyday . What a testimony! Before surgery, I was anxious to see how I'd feel after surgery. I was especially anxious to see if I'd really be well enough to leave the hospital after just two days. But, I was! While I did have to return to the hospital twice, that was for medication reactions and nothing to do with the surgery itself.

Later this morning, Mommy and I are going for a walk. We started a couple of days ago and we're planning to go everyday. We may opt for an afternoon walk today because it's cold this morning. The goal of everyday's walk is to go just a little farther. I'm not walking fast though. I just do what I can.

I hope everyone has a productive day.

Love to all,
Chanda

Psalm 150:6
Let everything that has breath praise the LORD.

RESURRECTION SUNDAY

2008-03-23T09:18:00.002-04:00

Happy Easter!

I'm preparing to go to church and thought I'd send out a quick Easter greeting to everyone. I hope you all get a chance to worship somewhere today. We're planning on church this morning then a dinner with extended family at my cousin Dooley's house this afternoon. Dooley can throw down in the kitchen as can my mother and sister. They've all prepared dishes so I'm planning to E-A-T today.-

Love to all!
Chanda

Mark 16:6
"Don't be alarmed," he said. "You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him.

Good Friday

2008-03-21T10:04:00.003-04:00

I can't believe it's almost Easter. Sunday, we're planning to go to church then to go to dinner at my cousin Dooley's house. That's become the tradition over the last few years.

As for today, I have no grand plans. I plan to get out for a walk but nothing else. I'm just going to take it easy.

Have a great weekend!

Chanda

Jeremiah 17:7-8
“But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”

LATEST CLINIC VISIT

2008-03-20T08:56:00.002-04:00

I'm back in Newnan from my latest Duke Clinic visit. I'll start with the good news then give you the drama.

I got a chance to see my MRI's from before and after the surgery. Before you can clearly see a 4 cm tumor in the back of my head. The tumor was 2.3 cm when the doctors first discovered it in November so it grew quite a bit during chemo and radiation. After surgery, the MRI is clear, as in the tumor is completely gone. Dr. Friedman got all of it. PRAISE THE LORD! Yesterday I talked to the "team" about post-surgery treatment. I'll be on chemo for several more months, actually different kinds of chemo to keep my body guessing. I have two more cycles of Temodar coming up in March and April then another MRI to make sure there is no regrowth.

OK.... now for the drama. We had a two and a half hour delay last night in returning to Atlanta. We didn't get back to Atlanta until 10:45. We were supposed to return at 8:20! There was a problem with our plane so they had to repair it. Mommy and I were exhausted by the time we finally made it home around 12:30 this morning. Other than that, we had a good trip aside from quite a bit of waiting at the clinic earlier in the morning and of course, all of the waiting at the the airport.

Well, I'll return to Duke in a couple of weeks to see Dr. Friedman. In the meantime, I'm feeling good today and I thank God for that.

Don't forget to pray for Jeanene, the 14 year old GBM patient!!

Love to all,
Chanda

2008-03-18T12:14:00.002-04:00

Good Afternoon everyone,
I'm a little late blogging today. This morning I had breakfast with JaQuitta, who's battling breast cancer. We've been in frequent contact since my diagnosis but we hadn't seen in each other in a few years. Anyway, we had a great time and a pretty tasty breakfast at Cracker Barrel. I'm still having problems wih my taste buds but this breakfast was good. It was nice seeing JaQuitta too. She's been a real friend throughout this entire ordeal.

I wanted to pass along something else. Yesterday I mentioned Brian and his 14 year old sister who has a GBM. Her name is Jeaneane, so now we have a specific name to pray for everyday.

I'll be off to Durham in a few hours. I have an appointment tomorrow morning with Dr. Reardon, the neuro-oncologist. I tried to get a flight early in the morning but couldn't so we're flying up tonight and will return tomorrow evening. This is basically a checkup following surgery.

Today I'm feeling good; I think a little stronger than yesterday so that's good. I still don't feel 100% but that's normal. However, I feel a little stronger everyday.

I'll try to check in tomorrow but I won't make any promises since I'll be on the road.

Love to all,
Chanda

2008-03-17T07:41:00.002-04:00

Good Monday morning to you!

I got an email last night from a guy whose 14 year old sister has a GBM tumor, the same kinid that I have. I can't imagine being 14 battling something like this so my thoughts and prayers are with their family. This is a tough battle that takes every ounce of energy you can muster. Anyway, everyone please add Brian's family to your prayer list as his sister continues to undergo radiation and chemo. I've emailed Brian to get her first name so I'll pass that along when I get it. In the meantime, God will know who we're talking about.

That's the wonderful thing about this blog. I'm sitting here in Georgia writing and reaching out to people around the world. We're all praying for each other. Though I would have never chosen to face a challenge like this, having the blog and having everyone praying for each other has been a wonderful by product of it all.

Today I'm feeling pretty good. I got up around 7:00 a.m. I'm going to eat breakfast in a minute. No big plans today except to see my friend Deidra. It's been a while so it'll be nice to see her.

Have a great day everyone.

Love to all,
Chanda

Romans 8:28

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,who have been called according to his purpose.

WE MADE IT TO CHURCH

2008-03-16T16:53:00.003-04:00

It's Palm Sunday and we made it to church this morning for the first time in weeks. I simply haven't had the energy but this morning I woke up and really wanted to be in the number.

We got a wonderfully warm reception from Rev. McDonald and the rest of the congregation at First Iconium. They've all been praying for us throughout this entire ordeal which has made a huge difference! For those of you who don't know, while I'm battling cancer, my mother is recovering from a heart attack she suffered in October, about a month before my diagnosis. She's doing better everyday, thank God. Meanwhile, having two people to care for is a lot on Loren's shoulders, so everyone is keeping her lifted up in prayer as well. Thank God, we're holding up under all the pressure and giving God the praise for keeping us strong.

I'm looking forward to be in church again next Sunday for Easter.

I hope everyone had a good weekend. I'll check in with you tomorrow..

Love to all
Chanda

Ephesians 3:20
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,

WEEKEND UPDATE

2008-03-15T09:29:00.003-04:00

It's been a stormy night in downtown Atlanta. A tornado came through last night causing quite a bit of damage. We had a storm come through Newnan early this morning. Thankfully the storm this morning wasn't bad but we could be in for more rough weather today.

I'm doing well. I don't feel 100% just yet.. My legs are still a little weak but I know I'll get my strength back soon.

Have a nice weekend everyone.

Love to all,
Chanda

CELL PHONE DEAD

2008-03-14T17:44:00.002-04:00

If you're trying to contact me via my cell phone, it's dead and I won't have a new one for a couple of days.. So email me if you need me.

Chanda

BACK AT HOME

2008-03-14T09:04:00.002-04:00

Thank God I'm back at home in Newnan this morning. We returned home yesterday. It's been a long week. I suffered a few setbacks... had some bad reactions to medications but that has been worked out and I'm feeling MUCH improved.

Anyway I was in the hospital yesterday and my mother thought the doctors would want to observe me another day or so. But Dr. Reardon said the best medicine would be for me to go home and rest. Amen, brother! So, we hurriedly gathered our stuff yesterday morning and made a midday flight from Raleigh to Atlanta.

We had to board Smokey and Roger while we were gone and I was sure Smokey was going to be hating me big time since I had left him for more than a week. WRONG! He's been by my side practically 24/7 since we got back home. He's purring, meowing, and all in my lap and by my side since yesterday.

I'm feeling good too. And, it feels so good to be at home. I have to return to Duke for an appointment next week but at least I'm home for now.

Love to all,
Chanda

RAINY SATURDAY

2008-03-08T10:15:00.002-05:00

It's a somewhat dreary day here in Durham. It's raining/drizzling. Nor sure how warm it is today. I'm finally getting up. My sleep schedule is weird because I have to wake up throughout the night to take pain medicine, which means Loren and Mommy wake up too. They're on duty 24 hours a day.

We don't really have anything planned today. I feel stronger today than I did yesterday so I'll venture in the hallway a couple of times for a walk. I'll probably hang out in the hotel lobby a bit too just to have a change of scenery. I think we'll go out for lunch too just not sure where we'll go.

Overall I'm glad that God continues to bless me by healing my body. And, I thank you for your continued prayers.

Love to all,
Chanda

ISAIAH 40:31
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

WE MADE IT TO FRIDAY!

2008-03-07T06:24:00.003-05:00

Good morning everyone and T.G.I.F.
What a wild week! I can't believe I had brain surgery on Monday and here it is Friday and I'm up and walking around. God is amazing!

Well, I continue to feel good. I've been keeping up on my pain medication so that the pressure doesn't build too much in my head. The nurses kept telling me to stay AHEAD of the pain and I am following their advice.

Actually my medicine schedule is about the same as it was before surgery...the only difference is that I'm taking a different dosage of the steroid. That steroid has my face SO huge! Actually the hunger side effect has improved. I still want to eat my meals but I'm not craving snacks like crazy. On another positive note, my sight appears to be improving still. I'm anxious to see what Dr. Friedman has to say about that when I see him next week. Also, it appears my hair is growing back where the radiation took it out. I'll be glad when it all evens out so I don't have to worry about any wigs or scarves.

Today I don't have much planned. Loren and I are going to Cracker Barrel for breakfast. I wouldn't mind a trip to Target or to the mall later on but we'll see. If we end up going that route, I will ride around in the wheelchair because I don't want to overdo it.

I'll check in with you tomorrow to let you know what's up with me and I hope everybody has a great Friday and weekend.

Love to all,
Chanda

Psalm 100
1Make a joyful noise unto the LORD, all ye lands.
2Serve the LORD with gladness: come before his presence with singing.
3Know ye that the LORD he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
4Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.
5For the LORD is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.

PRAISE REPORT & BIRTHDAY GREETINGS

2008-03-06T07:32:00.005-05:00

First the praise report:
It appears my right eyesight is improving. I can see better out of my right eye than I could a couple of days ago. GOD IS GOOD! Basically my range of vision in the right eye is improving. More of my right field of vision was cut off two days ago than it is right now. I know God is a healer but He continues to offer us proof that with Him nothing is impossible!
So, I'm doing my praise dance! I never doubted that God would bring me through this surgery restored and I'm standing on His promises right now.

Now to the birthday greetings. Praise God for bringing Loren through another year. Today is her 37th birthday. Loren owns her own business called Anna Abrams Design, which is named after our maternal grandmother. Loren has been through a lot over the past few months because she's been taking care of Mommy since her heart attack in October and now she's looking out for me. Of course when you're a business owner, you have to work to eat! She was selected as one of the designers for the Christmas Show House late last year and she was also one of the featured designers for a prestigious AIDS fundraiser. The exposure has been good for business so we're praising God for keeping her strong and bringing new business her way. We're going to Maggiano's for lunch for a birthday celebration. Other than that, we'll be maxin' and relaxin' here in the hotel room. I plan to take a couple of strolls outside to get some fresh air.

Finally, thank you to everyone for the continued prayers. It's unbelievable but I've heard from people that I haven't talked to in years. I've also gotten words of support from people I don't even know. God is so good.

Love to all,
Chanda

Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

OUT OF THE HOSPITAL

2008-03-05T15:10:00.003-05:00

PRAISE THE LORD. I WAS RELEASED FROM THE HOSPITAL TODAY!
Overall I feel really good. I am having eyesight issues as Dr. Friedman warned but I won't complain about that. I've been reading a little to help with my eye strength and that seems to help. But, it takes quite a bit longer for me to write, read, and comprehend everything. I've also been walking a bit each day to keep my physical strength up. I'm not trying to run any marathons but I do want to walk up and down the hallway a couple of times daily.

Loren and Mommy have been taking great care of me, as have the doctors, nurses, and staff at Duke. I was released from the hospital around noon. I'll be here in the Durham area through next Tuesday which is when I have a doctors appointment.

Again I feel really good. I have experienced pressure in my head where the incision is. I've also been nauseous but I have medication for both. The pressure is getting better which is good. When it's intense it makes it hard to lie down and get some rest.

Thank you Loren for updating the blog yesterday and thanks to all of you for wanting to know how I'm doing! Rest assured, the Lord was right there with me the entire time and He continues to be with me right now.

I'll try to update you guys later this week if I feel up to it. Actually I think I'll take a little nap right now.

Love to all!
Chanda

Praise the Name of Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior!

2008-03-04T14:10:00.002-05:00

Dear Family, Friends, and Bloggers:

I just wanted to let everyone know that Chanda is doing remarkable well post-op! Chanda is walking, talking, and just taking in everything around her, as any "task master" would and should.

YESTERDAY, the surgical team, led by Dr. Allan Friedman, took Chanda down around 2pm, then had her in pre-op, allowing Mommy to stay with her practically the entire time that the anesthesiologist was consulting and getting her prepared to go under for the operation. A kind technician was loving enough to allow me to "bend the rules" a wee bit to see her before she went into surgery--a "no-no" in the official rules book, since one family member was already with her. I don't know her name, but I cannot tell her how much I appreciate her compassion and loving spirit.

In any case, at around 3 pm, Dr. Friedman, the brain surgeon, passed by the waiting area on the 4th floor, a more secluded, restful area than the 3rd floor area where weary family members congregated in anticipation of their loved ones prognosis...and he told us that Chanda was prepped and they would be starting her surgery in less than half and hour.

Mommy, Uncle Paul, Aunt Lillie and I sat together making meaningless chit-chattery, filled with a great deal of nervous anticipation about what was going on. Around 3:35pm, the exceptionally loud beeper mechanism like the obnoxious objects given out at T.G.I. Friday's buzzed incessantly, and Mommy shot down to the surgical floor (the 3rd) to see what was going on. They merely wanted us to know that Chanda’s surgery had begun.

We returned to chatting then meditating, and meditating to eating, and finally a mere 2 1/2 to 3 hours later, Dr. Friedman emerged, and came to tell us in person that the surgery had gone particularly well and he feels they removed all of the tumor! We were absolutely ecstatic! I felt like it was the "Showcase Showdown" on "The Price Is Right" when Bob Barker announces the contestant's bid, then he exclaims with glee that the actual retail price of your showcase is...and the person is within $100 of the actual price (I think that is what the amount was), thus they have won the DOUBLE SHOWCASE SHOWDOWN!!! Thank you JESUS! "Waah, wamp, waah, wamp, waaah, wampppp" siren sound effect sounds (accompanied by the police blue lights)....you know the rest!

A little better than 2 hours went by and we got to see Chanda, as they took her off the elevator rolling her to the ICU. She was very groggy, but she talked briefly explaining that her head was filled with a lot of pressure. After settling into the ICU, we visited with her until around 9:50pm and went back to the hotel for the evening since no visitor are allowed to stay in the ICU over night. Chanda looked beautiful with wide brown eyes and double O curly eyelashes! It reminded me of how Chanda looked on her 4th birthday, when she proclaimed that from that day forward she would no longer be toted around by Daddy, because she was now a "big girl" and Chanda has practically been an ADULT since that day!

This morning we were sooooooo worn and weary from the mental weight being lifted that we were zombies and just could not get out of the bed. In typical "Chanda Taylor/Task Master" fashion, Chanda had the nurse to call us around 9:20am to inquire about our whereabouts! Heeeee-larious (hilarious)! We sprang into action and got over to the hospital. Finally, we got "up and at 'em" and arrived at DUMC just better than 10am.

Now Chanda is continued to communicate well, walking, and getting acclimated to her vision deficiencies (mild peripheral issues). Chanda just got finished eating lunch and is resting well.

I just want to thank Uncle Paul, Aunt Lillie, and ALLLLL of the long list of family, friends, colleagues (of Chanda's), bloggers, and such forth that have been on this journey to wellness with Chanda, as well as Mommy and I. Special thanks to the Abrams, Martin, and Taylor families for the support that they have lent us, as well as the many prayers; thank you much to all of our friends at First Iconium Baptist (& Circle of Love), Mount Vernon Baptist (Newnan), Newnan Chapel, Beaver Dam Baptist, Orlando Bible Study group, and many others; our sincerest gratitude to our neighbors and friends in Newnan--"The Street" (Guys, Dowdells, Johnsons, Ransbys, Chaneys), plus our group of "usual suspects" (Jessies, Waltons, Washingtons, Davies, Jones, Dyes, Stephens, Connallies, Jenkins, Gibsons, Keiths, etc.); Northwestern "Black Women's Posse"; WSB, WFTV, and CNN cronies (especially Deidra, Ronni, Kellie, Kisha, Jaquitta, Vanessa, Melanie, and everyone); and finally thanks to Stephanie, Jan, and the chaplain!!!! We love all of our peeps! Oh, and thank God and the CIA for the Internet, because without this wonderful vehicle of information, we would be unable to share in this voyage and speak to others that have had a similar diagnosis; or speak with their wonderful, supportive families and friends.
We cannot wait to see the boys too (Roger and Smokey)! Oh, and thanks Peggy from Brenau!

Please forgive me for the formatting and writing style in advance as I am NOT a journalist like my sister...just a lil' ol' interior designer (LOL). I bring drama to rooms, and I sometimes paint pictures with words. We can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens US!

Thank you ALL,

Loren A. Taylor
Big Sister

SURGERY IN A FEW HOURS

2008-03-03T09:32:00.005-05:00

Good morning everyone,

I took a couple of pictures of myself this morning. You can see my face is swollen--really swollen! That's just one of the side effects of the steroid I'm taking. They've beefed up the dosage before surgery so my face may get even chubbier! The steroid helps control the swelling in my brain.

And, see those funky white things on my forehead? Those are called fiduciary markers. The doctors use them as guides during the surgery. One of the doctors came by yesterday and glued them to my head.

My surgery is scheduled to start around 2pm. I'm Dr. Friedman's third and last patient today. He expects the surgery to last four to five hours. I'm NPO, which means NOTHING to eat or drink before surgery! I'm dying!!! Right now my throat is really dry. I've also had some hunger pains. Last night the nurse made sure I got a midnight snack plus I ate a full dinner. A meal would be nice but I'm OK. When a hunger pain strikes, I just whisper a prayer and a scripture.

Again, surgery is around 2pm. I'm just waiting now.

Love to all,

Chanda

BACK IN NORTH CAROLINA

2008-03-02T06:03:00.003-05:00

Good Sunday morning to you!
We made it to North Carolina yesterday. Our flight was pretty pleasant; not too crowded. The only bad part was that we were at Gate A3 at Hartsfield which meant we had to walk the entire length of the concourse! Once we arrived in Raleigh-Durham, my god sister picked us up. She and her fiance now live here so we got a chance to see her and to get a ride to the hotel. Thanks, Antoinette and Matt.

I've been having hot flashes again. My head especially gets really hot! Yesterday on the plane I was wearing that wig and I truly wanted to snatch it off. I tell you I came thisclose! Hopefully I won't have to wear it much longer. I'm starting to feel some peach fuzz growing on the sides of my head where the radiation took out my hair. Once that starts growing in, I think I'm going to ditch the wig.

I'll be checking into the hospital in a few hours. The plan is to leave the hotel and be at the hospital around 9:00 a.m. The nurse told me last week they want me checked in by 11:00 am so they can do a lot of tests. I'll also get a chance to talk to Dr. Friedman today about the surgery. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to eat before the tests so I'm going to skip breakfast just in case.

I'm feeling good about the surgery. Actually I'm anxious to get it over with so I can see how I feel without this tumor in my head! Just knowing it'll be gone makes me get excited! I do feel a few butterflies in my stomach, which is natural before surgery but overall I feel "prayed up." I know God is going to take care of me in that operating room and as I recover and get stronger.

Again, thanks for all of your prayers. Loren will update the blog this week to let you know how I'm doing. I hope to update it myself later in the week once I'm released from the hospital.

Love to all,
Chanda

Jeremiah 30:17
For I will restore health unto thee, and I will heal thee of thy wounds, saith the LORD; because they called thee an Outcast, saying, This is Zion, whom no man seeketh after.

NO FEAR HERE

2008-02-29T11:16:00.003-05:00

Tomorrow we leave for Durham so I'll be packing my stuff this afternoon and tonight. I don't have a lot to do. Basically I'll need a couple of comfy outfits plus my pajamas. That's easy enough. I still haven't heard back from Dr. Friedman's office about what time the surgery will be on Monday. I'll be seeing him on Sunday so I'm sure I'll find out soon enough.

This morning I ran some last-minute errands: bank, pharmacy, etc. In about an hour, my friend Stephanie is going to pick me up to take me to lunch. Very nice of you Stephanie. Thanks! Y'all may recall that Stephanie and I went to high school together but lost touch until last year. Since my diagnosis she's been a real friend--driving me to radiation, calling to check on me, and now of course, taking to me to lunch. It's such a blessing to have great friends like Stephanie. I've been blessed many times over to have a number of loyal friends who call and/or write me on a regular basis to see how I'm doing. This morning when I was praying, I thanked God repeatedly for that blessing.

That's about all I have to report. We leave for Durham tomorrow afternoon and I check into the hospital Sunday morning for tests. I'm ready! I feel as though God has already healed me and that this surgery is what I have to go through to get my healing, so bring it on! No fear here... just lots of FAITH!

Love to all,
Chanda

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know what I have planned for you,’ says the Lord. 'I have plans to prosper you, not to harm you. I have plans to give you a future filled with hope.'

FEELING GOOD AND FULL OF FAITH

2008-02-28T08:15:00.005-05:00

Good morning everyone!
Just a few more days until my surgery. I'm ready for it. I don't know what time it will start yet. I called Dr. Friedman's office yesterday and left a message. Hopefully his nurse will have an answer for me and call me back this week. They're busy folks so I'll try to be patient.

My uncle and aunt live in South Carolina and they'll be driving up to Duke Monday during my surgery. I want to hold off with other visitors after surgery because I want to see how I feel. I talked to another GBM tumor patient who had surgery and she said noise really bothered her after surgery. So, my mom and sister have promised me that they'll wait to hear from me before allowing any visitors post-surgery.

Overall I'm doing well. I've been feeling pretty good. Yesterday I ran a few errands with Mommy. We went to lunch then we stopped by JC Penney and Belk. I bought a couple of pairs of pajamas so I'll look somewhat fashionable while I'm recovering from surgery. I also did my laundry. I hadn't done it myself in a while and it felt good to be able to have the energy to do a simple chore like that-- REALLY!

Today Loren and I are going to go to a local vet's office to get Smokey and Roger squared away for boarding. Since we'll be away for a bit, we thought it'd be best to board the cats. We found a place where they can share a kitty condo. Isn't that sweet? They don't like being away from home (especially Smokey) but at least they'll be able to keep each other company.

Again, thank you all for your prayers and support. I also wanted to remind you that you can read more about the Duke Brain Tumor Center by clicking on the link under "Favorite Links" that's in the right margin. Just FYI....

Love to all!
Chanda
-----------------------------
James 1:2-4
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

A RAINY & BUSY DAY IN GEORGIA

2008-02-26T09:13:00.004-05:00

Good morning friends,
It's been a stormy morning in Georgia. I woke up to the sound of rain and thunder a few hours ago. It's finally moved out of the area. I hope nobody was hurt or their homes damaged from the weather because I rather enjoyed the sounds. That's good sleeping weather, ya know?

Today I have a short doctor's appointment. I have to go to the oncologist to get my blood drawn. That's the weekly drill because of my chemo. Fortunately my blood work has been excellent throughout so I anticipate another good report today.

I also have to go to the DMV today to turn in my Florida drivers license. I'll only get a Georgia state ID back since I've been told I can't drive. I should have done it already but you know how those things go. Who wants to go the DMV? The only reason I'm going now is because my insurance company called and told me time's up!

I'm also going to have lunch today with my friends Deidra and Ronni. They're coming by to hang out with me so I'm looking forward to that. I've been feeling good these days so I know we'll have a nice visit.

Yesterday Loren and I went out and ran a few errands. It was a great day... very warm and sunny. Earlier, Loren did my hair. I figure the doctors at Duke are going to shave my head so Loren went ahead and cut off my remaining hair. I didn't have a lot anyway because the radiation took out much of it. So, it really wasn't a big deal for me. I don't go out without a scarf or a wig anyway so no one will really notice the difference. It's just for me. I do have to wear something on my head inside the house, though, because my head gets cold.

Well it's coming up on 9:30 and I have to be at the doctor's office at 11:00 so I gotta go.

Love to all,
Chanda

Luke 8:48
And he said unto her, Daughter, be of good comfort: thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace.

ONE WEEK AWAY

2008-02-25T08:23:00.002-05:00

One week from today I'll be at Duke Hospital in surgery. For an anal list-maker like me, that means there's a lot of my "to do" list. I have errands to run everyday so I'll get everything done before I leave for Durham this weekend.

One of the most important things to do this week is to celebrate Loren's birthday. It's actually next week but we did some early celebrating this weekend. Saturday, Loren and I also got some much needed pedicures. Our feet were jacked up! While I was enjoying my foot massage, I picked up Readers Digest and read an interview with Denzel Washington. The reporter asked him how he got through hard times. He answered that faith gets him through. He went on to say that one day you're going to have to walk with God when you don't understand where he's taking you. Amen, brotha!

Along the same lines, I heard an interesting quote yesterday while watching my "Bedside Baptist" service (it was Coral Ridge Ministries in Florida) Anyway, the pastor said that faith grows best in winter, meaning we rely and lean on God the strongest when we're going through hard times. I needed to hear both of those messages because I continue to pray for God to increase my faith more and more each day.

Initially when I heard I needed surgery, I wanted to curl up and cry. The simple thought of having to have BRAIN surgery was too much. I hate any kind of surgery but this really hits home for our family. Back in 1981, my paternal grandmother was diagnosed with a brain tumor and had to have surgery. I was only 8 years old at the time and didn't realize the seriousness of the situation until I saw my father run out of my grandma's hospital room crying after she had surgery. Her head was wrapped up in gauze and there were tubes and wires coming out of everywhere. I have never been so scared in my life! My father was the strongest person I knew. If he was scared and upset, I knew there was a problem. Sadly, my grandma never recovered from the surgery so I have had to get those negative images out of my head. I've spent most of the past two weeks just praying and reading the Bible and asking God to take away from doubts and fears. You know that's nothing but the devil! Thankfully, the Lord has heard me and I truly believe I will come out of surgery 100% healed and restored.

Again thank you for all of your prayers!

Love to all,

Chanda

I Peter 1:6-7

In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials.

These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

SURGERY UPDATE (WE HAVE A DATE!)

2008-02-22T18:20:00.004-05:00

Hello Everyone,
Less than an hour ago I FINALLY got a call back from Dr. Friedman's office at Duke. I will be having surgery on Monday, March 3rd. I'll be admitted to the hospital the previous day for a battery of tests. The first night after surgery I'll be in the ICU then I'll be transferred to a private room and released the day after that. I'll have to stay in the Durham area until March 10th just in case any complications arise following surgery. I am prayerful that will NOT be the case. I know you all will keep me lifted up in prayer so I'm NOT claiming any problems or complications.

I'm so glad that call came in because I didn't want to have to wait all weekend before hearing the news. Now we can concentrate on preparing for the trip and of course, we're going to continue praying every step of the day.

Again, I apologize for being out of touch the past week or so. I've been physically and mentally spent from all of this latest drama and I'm gearing up for what's ahead, whatever that may be.

Love to all,
Chanda

2 Corinthians 5:7
For we walk by faith not by sight

LATE NIGHT UPDATE

2008-02-20T22:51:00.003-05:00

Good evening everyone,
This is a late post for today because I spent a lot of time resting today. We got home around 10pm last night and I was out by 11! This morning I had a(nother) doctor's appointment and then ran some errands with Mommy. After lunch, I was ready for a nap. I lounged most of the afternoon before finally eating dinner and watching American Idol this evening.

I wanted to thank everyone for all of the calls and emails I've received over the past few days. I apologize for not returning every call or email. Some of you have asked me specifics about the surgery. I don't have any to share right now. Quite honestly, I usually let Loren or Mommy handle the note-taking aspects of my doctor's appointments. Right now, I don't want to know the nitty-gritty of how they're going to slice me open. I'm just not up for that right now. It was hard enough for me to wrap my mind around having to have surgery in the first place, so I've turned everything over to God and I know everything will be OK.

By the way, I did talk to someone from Dr. Friedman's office (the neurosurgeon) and I'm awaiting a call back to learn when we can schedule the surgery. I expect to hear back from them tomorrow so when I know, I'll let you know.

It's almost 11pm but I'll be up until midnight because I have some medication to take at 12.

Again thanks to everyone for all of your love and support and of course, your prayers!

Love to all,
Chanda

Ephesians 3:20
Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,

DECISIONS, DECISIONS

2008-02-19T14:32:00.003-05:00

We spent half the day at the Duke Clinic. The first doctor I saw was Dr. Friedman at the Brain Tumor Center. He explained the benefits and risks of surgery. Later, I spoke to another doctor at the clinic who talked about post-operative care. Bottom line, both doctors believe that surgery is my best option for beating this thing given the fact that the tumor has grown. Both dcotors also agree that I'll most likely lose part of eyesight due to the surgery. But given the choice between between my life and partial sight, I'll take former. I'm going to continue to pray about it and call Dr. Friedman back in a day or two.

I want thank all of you for your prayers thus far. They're definitely lifting me up!

Love to all,
Chanda

Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

WE'RE HERE

2008-02-18T20:26:00.003-05:00

We arrived in Raleigh-Durham around 5:30 this evening for my appointment tomorrow at Duke. Beforehand, I had an appointment at Piedmont in Atlanta with my radiation oncologist. He, of course, was disappointed that I had not responded as well as he'd hope to the radiation and chemo this far. (Speaking of chemo, I finish this month's round tonight. Fortunately I haven't felt sick from it!) Dr. Nowlan, the radiation oncologist in Atlanta, also wants me to continue taking the steroid since they're obviously are making me feel better. Last week, I felt dizzy, tired and I had trouble finding words as a result of the swelling around the tumor. I continue to have problems reading and writing. It takes a long time for me to comprehend what I read and I write crooked. Oh well, it'll all be resolved in time.

So, when you read this, please send up a BIG prayer for me. I've been praying so hard for God to take away the fear I've felt about having surgery. I have a sneaking suspicion that will be what the doctor recommends tomorrow since he's a neurosurgeon and all! Whatever he says or does, I have to remember that God is in control 100% of the time! If I do end up having surgery, it'll probably be next week. Again, I'll keep you posted.

Love to all!
Chanda

Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

IT'S TIME TO KICK CANCER'S BUTT!

2008-02-15T10:58:00.003-05:00

The past few days have been a blur. I was devastated to learn that the tumor is growing. I'm also trying to come to term with the fact that I'll probably have to have surgery, probably when I'm awake!

Quite honestly, it's all very overwhelming. It seems as though I was able to handle the radiation, the chemo and all that came with it but hearing the doctor say that the tumor is growing really threw me for a loop. This whole experience has been hard for me but I guess I wasn't prepard to hear that my condition was getting worse. I refuse to claim it though. I know that God is still in charge and that He is the ultimate healor.

So I'm dusting myself off and preparing for the fight of my life. God is still in charge!

Love to all,
Chanda

Isaiah 40:31 (King James Version)
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

NOT GIVING UP!

2008-02-13T09:38:00.005-05:00

The last 24 hours have been tiring. I went to Piedmont yesterday for an MRI which took about an hour. I got a little sick to my stomach during the second part of the test, when they inject you with the contrast. The technician was so nice though. He took time to make sure I felt OK before they proceeded with the test. After that, I saw the neurologist Dr. Wray and received some not-so-good news. Dr. Wray said it seems that the tumor has gotten larger. Clearly that was not the news I wanted to hear. Dr. Wray said it's time to explore additional optionos for treatment including surgery. I'll be going to the Brain Tumor Center at Duke University next Tuesday for a consultation. All I can do in the meantime is pray. Later today I'll learn more about what I'm in for at Duke so I'll let y'all know when I know.

Love to all,
Chanda

Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

HAPPY MONDAY

2008-02-11T10:31:00.000-05:00

I hope everyone had a nice weekend. First let me tell you about the surprise. Loren surprised Mommy and me Friday with massages. They were quite relaxing. We went out to dinner after so we had a nice outing Friday afternoon/evevning.

Yesterday we went to church then to dinner at this new restaurant. The food was so-so but we had a nice time anyway. Today Deidra is coming by to pick me up for lunch. I'm doing a lot of eating it seems, huh? Fortunately my appetite is better though I don't eat a lot and I don't think about food much at all. At least the thought of food isn't repulsive.

Well I'm off. I've got to get dressed so I can go to lunch.

Love to all,
Chanda

SMOKEY'S UNDER THE WEATHER....

2008-02-08T10:30:00.000-05:00

It's about 10:30 am on Friday and it's been a pretty good week. I've been feeling stronger and more like my old self. I still need an afternoon nap most days but a good hour does me good. A couple of days this week I ventured outside for a nice walk. I wasn't tired and it felt good to get some fresh air.

Yesterday Mom and I had to take Smokey to the vet because he was squinting in his left eye. Turns out he had some sort of irritation from a scratch in his eye. Lucky me, now I have to put ointment in his eye three times a day for a 10 days! Of course, he was perfectly still while the vet checked him out. She even squirted some kind of liquid in his eye and gave him an eye exam. However, when I had to give him the medicine, he tried to bite me! I'm also having to give Smokey some medicine to help clear up a dandruff problem. I tried to put it over his food but he wouldn't eat it so I had to resort to desperate measures. I have to pour it in his mouth. Yesterday Mom and I tagged teamed him. I held him down while Mom gave him the medicine. This morning, I woke him up and did a surprise attack so he didn't have time to react. I'm not sure if I'm punishing him or myself! Hopefully, Smokey will be back to normal soon. It's a lot of work caring for a pet! Hopefully, the Smokester will be back to normal soon so we don't have to go through all of these shenanigans.

Today, Loren is taking Mom and me out for some type of a surprise. Mommy is dying to know what it is and she's been snooping around to figure it out. I'm a snooper myself but this time I decided to not to snoop and let myself be surprised! So I'll let you know what it is this weekend.

Love to all,
Chanda

SUPER TUESDAY

2008-02-05T15:08:00.000-05:00

It's Super Tuesday and I'm feeling good but this has nothing to do with politics! Healthwise, I've felt pretty good the last few days. I continue to struggle with my appetite. I've been drinking ginger tea which helps a bit. Overall, I won't complain.

I went to the onocologist today for a checkup. I also got a new prescription for my latest round of chemo. I should get the mail order in the next few days. This time around, it's just a five day treatment, but it's stronger than the dose I took while I was on radiation. The doctor warned me the nausea may hit me harder this time around, so I'm bracing myself for that.

I've spent much of the afternoon on the phone. I talked to JaQuitta today. I called to congratulate her on her last radiation treatment. I know firsthand how excited she is to be putting that behind her. Towards the end, radiation becomes such a chore! JaQuitta is doing well so I pray for her continued recovery. I also was on the phone with my insurance company. I called to follow up about getting a second opinion about my diagnosis. My insurance company has an entire unit dedicated to helping cancer patients which is a nice perk. I'd like to go to Duke University Hospital to get a second opinion. My neurologist suggested I go to Duke because they have a brain cancer center that's well-known and well-respected. They also do a lot of clinical trials so there may be an opporunity for me to get some cutting edge treatment. We'll see....
I have an appointment with my neurologist in one week. I'll have a followup MRI first then meet with the doctor. I'm anticipating nothing but good news so I'm excited to hear what the doctor has to say. Of course, as soon as I know, I'll let y'all know.

I'm also anxiously awaiting any sign hair in the back of my head! I'm still sporting this modified, asymmetric mohawk. Not a good look. I'm still wearing scarves when I go out. I wear them at home at times, too because my bald head tends to get cold. Hopefully I'll get a little peach fuzz on my head soon.

Happy Fat Tuesday and "Laissez les bons temps rouler!"
Chanda

A DO-NOTHING KIND OF DAY

2008-02-01T18:03:00.000-05:00

I never made it out of my jammies today. I woke up around 9:00 am feeling OK but I didn't have much of an appetite. I ate some prunes for breakfast which doesn't sound appetitzing but it's one of the few foods that I can eat consistently these days without feeling sick. I had a banana flavored Ensure drink for lunch. Not that tasty but I kept it down. I eventually took a nap this afternoon and woke up feeling better. I'm still not hungry but I hope my appetite will wake up a bit by the time I eat dinner.

Overall it was a lazy kinda day. Smokey and Roger were lazier than normal today. I think it's an after-effect of their vaccinations yesterday. The vet's office called this afternoon to check on them. I did get a little worried this afternoon because Smokey didn't even move from his spot until this afternoon! And, I had to hunt Roger down. He finally came upstairs when I bribed him with some cat treats.

Loren and Mom have been gone all day. Loren had a couple of appointments this morning and Mom had a doctor's appointment this afternoon. They're still out and about because Loren is working on a project. Business has been good for her since she finished the Christmas show house so PRAISE GOD!

If anything particularly interesting happens this weekend I'll update you. Otherwise I'll check in with you Monday.

Love to all,
Chanda

2 Timothy 1:7
For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

FEELING GOOD!

2008-01-31T17:07:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone!
I'm feeling good today. My sleep schedule is still off. I woke up around 3:00 am and then at 5:00 am. I couldn't fall back asleep the second time until about 7:00 then I finally got up at 10:00 am. Once I got my day going, I had enough energy to help Mommy take "the boys" (that'd be Smokey and Roger) to the vet. I was excited because it was a doctor's appointment where I wasn't the patient! They both did great. Smokey's paws were clammy the whole time. He's not very sociable and he was quite nervous. Roger was freaked out when we first got in the car but he adapted quickly. I'm happy to report both of them are healthy but they do have tartar on their teeth. I guess it's time to break out the Crest! :-)

As for me I'm feeling fine. My energy level has been good today. My doctor has been weaning me off the steroid I've been taking since I was first diagnosed. This week, I'm taking a small dose every other day. I had noticed that my energy level was off on the days I wasn't taking it but that wasn't the case today. I'm prayerful that I will only continue to get stronger and that I won't feel too tired when I'm completely off the medication. I tell you that steroid is a blessing and curse. When I was on a strong dose, I felt no pain but I couldn't sleep. I was up all through the night. When my doctor started decreasing my dose, my sleep improved but then I started feeling tired and my appetite was awful. I think I'm finally adjusting. I have to remind myself to eat every few hours, even if it's a small amount. Eating every few hours seems to help keep my energy level up.

Tomorrow I'm doing to take it easy. If the weather is OK and I feel pretty good I'll take a stroll outside but other than that I'm not planning to do much.

Love to all,
Chanda

Hebrews 12:2
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

PATIENCE...

2008-01-29T16:41:00.000-05:00

I finally got a chance to talk to Oscar yesterday. We've emailed each other for a couple of months. Oscar has been battling the same type of tumor I have and he has a wealth of knowledge about GBM ranging from treatments to diet. Anyway, during the conversation I had a revelation about how things are going to progress in the weeks and months to come. Many of my friends seem eager for me to reach a milestone and for me to return to my normal routine. I'm eager for that to happen too but I now realize that it could be a long time before that happens.

Oscar told me that there are three types of people who battle cancer: the person who throws up his or her hands and gives up, the person who digs in his or her heels for a battle but gives out of steam before it's over, and then there's the person who acknowledges that fighting cancer is a lengthy, tiring ordeal and decides to stick it out and fight anyway. So as much as I want this to be over and for things to be back to normal, that's not what I'm dealing with. I can't predict how long it'll take for God to heal me. It could be weeks, months, or even years. Of course we're all impatient and want things done yesterday so the prospect of something taking years isn't very attractive. So my prayer is that God grants me patience and serenity while He heals me in whatever way He sees it. I thank you for your continued prayers.

Love to all,
Chanda

Colossians 1:10-11
And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience

WEEKEND UPDATE

2008-01-28T11:44:00.000-05:00

I hope everyone had a great weekend. I got a chance to catch up with some friends which is always nice. I got an email from my former boss Saturday offering me words of encouragement and support. He even offered me a trip to Disney World! How 'bout that? I'm looking forward to it! Thanks, Bob!!

I also talked to my friend Tonya. We were roommates in college for three years. Amazingly we still have lots to talk about after all these years. We were on the phone for about two hours Saturday. We were talking about how this experience has reminded both of us to live in the moment and thank God for ALL of your blessings. They're words to live by!

I also got an email from my GBM friend Oscar. (GBM is short for Glioblastoma Multiforme, the type of tumor I have) Anyway, Oscar emailed me this weekend to tell me that I've been selected for a "Blogger Award." Read all about it!

The Courageous Blogger Award goes to Chanda, of the My Brain Blog. Chanda has been diagnosed with the same brain cancer as I have, Glioblastoma Multiforme [GBM]. She writes about her challenges through this process with an honesty and humor that is not just a sign of her great personal strength, but is simultaneously a healing force for others, including myself.

I appreciate the recognition. Oscar is quite an inspiration himself. It's been a year since Oscar's GBM diagnosis and he's doing quite well. His tumor is even shrinking, which is wonderful news. You can read about the other Blogger Award winners here: http://freshtopia.net/vlog/?p=180#more-180

So, all it all, I had a great weekend. I hope you did too.

Love to all,
Chanda

"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up."- James 4:10

FRIDAY UPDATE

2008-01-25T10:38:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday friends!

Well, it's been two months now since this wild new journey began and I've been through a lot. Let's see, a seizure, a week long hospital stay, numerous tests including a painful biopsy, a brain tumor diagnosis, six weeks of chemo and radiation, hair loss.... I'll admit, at times it seems like it's just too much and I wish things were the way they used to be. That's not an option so I'm grateful to God for seeing me through. I also thank God for all of my family and friends for being there for me during the most difficult trial of my life.

Right now, I'm doing well. My appetite has picked up gradually this week so that's encouraging. After years of dieting who would have ever thought I would be struggling to eat and not gain weight?! Isn't that a hoot? Sometimes you just have to laugh! I also haven't had any double vision episodes as of late and no headaches! I'm taking it all as good signs that my prayers and my treatment have been effective. I'll know for sure when I have a follow-up MRI on February 12th.

Well, I for one have had enough of the sub-freezing cold weather. It was in the 20s this morning. It's supposed to warm up over the next few days so I'm looking forward to that and to getting outside for some fresh air this weekend.

Later, gators!
Chanda

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”- Philippians 4:8

TUESDAY UPDATE

2008-01-22T18:03:00.000-05:00

I don't have much to share with you these days. Everyday is pretty much the same. I've been resting and trying to regain my strength. Today I felt pretty good. I got up around 9:30 and ate about a half cup of yogurt for breakfast. I took a brief nap this afternoon then ate lunch late this afternoon. For the first time in several weeks, I didn't feel completely stuffed after eating today. As of late, I've felt like I overdid it at the buffet line even when I eat only a small meal. I'm grateful this phase is passing because it is a miserable feeling.

I have three doctor's appointments scheduled for February so I have to get myself psyched up for that. On the 5th, I'll see my oncologist Dr. Henderson to get me started on the second round of chemo. On the 12th, I see Dr. Wray, the neurologist, to get another MRI. I'm prayerful that appointment goes well and that it shows the tumor is indeed shrinking. Then, on the 18th, I see Dr. Nowlan, my radiation oncologist, for a one-month followup from radiation. In the meantime, rest and relaxation is at the top of my list. To that end, I have a massage scheduled for Thursday so I'm looking forward to that!

I'll check in later this week.

Love to all!
Chanda

Psalm 46:1
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.

SNOW DAY

2008-01-19T15:51:00.000-05:00

For the second time this week, it's snowing in Atlanta! We're supposed to get two to three inches south of the airport where I live. Tonight it's going to get really cold -- as in 20 degrees or below-- so it'll be rough going on the roads in the morning. I haven't done much today. I woke up around 8:30 to wait for the snow to fall, but I ended up falling asleep again around noon. As my doctor noted, I'll be a little sluggish in the next few weeks as a lingering side effect from the radiation.

Basically, all I'm doing this afternoon is watching reruns of America's Next Top Model and whatever is on TLC. Actually I'm going to start re-reading the book of Esther. It's one of my favorite books in the Bible and it's been a while since I've studied it.

Love to all,
Chanda

1 Thessalonians 5:16-22

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. Do not put out the Spirit's fire; do not treat prophecies with contempt. Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil.

OH WHAT A FEELING!

2008-01-18T15:50:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday everyone!
I'm officially finished with radiation. Praise the Lord! My last treatment was yesterday. Loren, Mommy and I celebrated with a trip to the spa and then lunch at Pappadeaux. Our celebration must have worn us out because we all slept in late this morning. It was nice not to have to get up and fight rush hour traffic to go to the hospital.

While I'm happy that radiation is over, it is only one phase of treatment. I will be on chemo for five more months. My chemo regimen resumes in February. I'll also have to return to the radiation oncologist for a follow up visit next month and I'll have to get a follow up MRI in March. I'm expecting to hear nothing but good news during those follow up visits.

Overall, I've felt great this week. I haven't been terribly tired. I do have to take a nap in the afternoons to maintain my strength. Next week, I plan to begin walking 20-30 minutes a day on a regular basis so I can start rebuilding my strength. I actually feel up to it now. A couple of weeks ago I couldn't have fathomed it. I was so wiped out each day that I couldn't carry a purse! Thank God for keeping me strong.

I also want to thank all of my family and friends for keeping me lifted up in prayer thus far. My journey isn't over yet but I know I'll make it because I have God and all of you on my side!

Love to all!
Chanda

Psalm 23:4
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

FINAL COUNTDOWN!

2008-01-16T17:02:00.000-05:00

We're less than 24 hours away from my final radiation treatment! How exciting! I plan to celebrate by taking Loren and Mommy out to lunch as a small token of thanks. It's been a six week long journey that has taken me through an array of emotions. Most days I was OK... I prayerfully prepared for each treatment but towards the end, I was sick of being sick, sick of going to the hospital everyday and just ready to be "normal." Of course, the normal I knew two months ago is vastly different from what normal will be from now on. Even though I'm almost done with radiation, my medical treatment is far from over. I still have five more months of chemo to go. I'll also focus on seeking out alternative and/or experimental treatments, all the while preparing to return to work in the coming weeks. It's a lot to sort out and it seems overwhelming at times! All I can do is take it one day at a time and ask God to carry me through my journey.

There's perhaps one of my friends who is as happy as I am that tomorrow is the final day for radiation. My friend and prayer partner Angie told me that she'd fast each day of my treatment. She broke the fast every evening and during Christmas and New Year's. Still, it's been a wonderful show of faithfulness and friendship that I appreciate greatly! Angie and her family and the rest of our Bible studies group in Orlando became my second family so I'm grateful to all of them for their love and prayers and support over the past two months.

Speaking of support, today I saw JaQuitta, who's also a cancer survivor. She's done with chemo and in the middle of radiation. She gave me the courage to take off my scarf in public and show off my bald head. Mind you, I do have hair but I have lost quite a bit. Anyway, it was nice seeing JaQuitta. She's been very supportive and ready to dispense advice or just listen. That means a lot. It also means a lot that so many of my friends and family and even people I don't know have been reading my blot and praying for me. Those prayers have definitely made a difference, so keep 'em coming!

Love to all,
Chanda

James 5:16

Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

COUNTING DOWN

2008-01-15T11:40:00.000-05:00

I have just two more radiation treatments to go! I can't wait. I'm hoping this "wintry mix" the meteorologists have been talking about for Thursday morning turns out to be nothing. I don't want the weather to delay the celebration of my last treatment. No matter what, I'll be finished this week so I won't sweat it.

The past couple of days I've been feeling nauseous. Usually, I take my anti-nausea meds once a day right before I take my chemo pills and I'm OK but this week I've felt nauseous several times a day. In fact, on Sunday I barely made it to church because I was feeling so bad. However, I didn't want the devil to get the best of me so I pulled myself together. I was really late to church, but at least I made it.

Otherwise, I'm feeling OK. The itching that was making me miserable last week seems to have subsided. It crops up occasionally but it's not nearly as intense as it was.

I'll check in with y'all later this week!

Love to all,
Chanda

Romans 12:12
Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;

"LAY YOUR HANDS ON ME"

2008-01-11T17:35:00.000-05:00

That was the title of last night's episode of Grey's Anatomy. Did you see it? It was great! Too bad the show will probably be in reruns for a while if this writers' strike isn't settled, but I digress. Back to last night's episode. Dr. Bailey's marriage is in shambles. The episode begins with the couple fighting as she leaves for work. Later, her husband calls her at the ER to tell her their baby had a serious accident at home. The doctors perform emergency surgery but the baby's condition is uncertain. As the Baileys ponder their child's future, they encounter a faith healer (who's also a patient at the hospital) and she's already healed a few patients at the hospital. After she lays hands on the baby, he regains consciousness and he makes a 180 degree turn for the better. Of course, some of the doctors at Seattle Grace insisted there was a medical explanation for his turnaround. In life we always encounter skeptics and non-believers. Since my diagnosis, I've said I know that God is going to heal me. I'm sure there are those who doubt my faith or God's power, but my faith remains strong.

As a side note, Ugly Betty was good last night too. I hope my friend Melodie caught it. It featured a cameo appearance from Bow Wow. Until a few weeks ago, Melodie didn't know who Bow Wow was! Since then I've been working with her to update her list of "hot celebrities." Maybe we'll use flash cards to help her out! Love ya, Melodie!

I hope everyone has a great weekend. I'll check in witn you Monday.

Chanda

1 Peter 2:24 (New International Version)

He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.

ITCHING FOR CHANGE

2008-01-10T14:53:00.000-05:00

I'm still itchy. It's been a week now. My doctors have narrowed down the possible cause to the anti-seizure drug I'm taking. I'm awaiting a call back from the neurologist for a new prescriptiontion. I hope this does the trick because I'm tired of being itchy all over!

I have just five radiation treatments to go. My last one is next Thursday. My friend Vanessa had warned me that toward the end of the treatments I would be sick and tired and going everyday. She was right. It's exhausting having to get up everyday, get dressed, fight traffic, and then go to a 10-15 minute appointment! It takes longer to get there and back home than it does to have the treatment. OK enough with the whining It's almost over!

I plan to post tomorrow and I hope to tell you that the itching has stopped! This has gone on long enough.

Love to all!
Chanda

Hebrews 10:22
let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.

ITCHY AND SCRATCHY

2008-01-07T20:05:00.000-05:00

Recognize these guys from The Simpsons? It's Itchy and Scratchy. Should for any reason they are unable to fulfill their roles, I can take over because I've been itching and scratching all over my face, chest and back since Thursday night! My doctors think it's a side effect of one of my medications. My neurologist prescribed a medication to help ease the itching but it hasn't completely worked. The itching is better but it's still there. I hope it gets better soon because I can't take much more! I go to the oncologist tomorrow so I'll ask him about it to see if he has any ideas on what could be causing this itching. Neither the radiation oncologist nor the neurologist 100% sure what's going on. God, I hope they figure it out soon before I rub my skin off. Gotta go. I'm typing with one hand and scratching with the other.

Love to all!

Chanda

Matthew 14:14
And Jesus went forth, and saw a great multitude, and was moved with compassion toward them, and he healed their sick.

A GOOD DAY

2008-01-06T15:18:00.000-05:00

Happy Sunday!
Take a look at this picture my friend Michelle emailed me. I looked so much younger and thinner back then. This picture was taken in 1991 at the end of my freshmen year at Northwestern. I was on a field trip with some girls from my dorm. We got tickets to a Bulls game. This was when the Bulls were HOT. We had nosebleed seats but it didn't matter. We were breathing the same air as Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, and Horace Grant. Thanks for the memories, Michelle.

I started the day a little slow. I woke up at 6:00 am to take my meds then attended "Bedside Baptist" (that's what I call it when I watch TV ministries). I fell asleep around 8:30 or 9:00 and I guess I was really wiped out. My mom came in my room around 10:15 or so and she had to really shake me to get me up. Since then, I've felt great today. I guess the comatose sleep did me good. I've managed to eat toast, turkey bacon, and apples for breakfast and soup and crackers for lunch. I think that's why I feel stronger today than I have in the past few days. I'll definitely make the effort to eat dinner even if I don't feel like it.

One more thing, I was mistaken yesterday with the calculations of my remaining radiation treatments. I actually have only NINE more treatments to go. My final one is on Thursday, January 17. I have an appointment with my other oncologist this week. He's the one who's in charge of chemotherapy. I started on a 28-day cycle, but the remaining cycles will be for five days a month, at least that's what I was told last month. I'll have to take those treatments for five more months.

That's all I have for today. Hope you enjoyed your day.

Love to all!
Chanda

1 Cor 15:58
Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye stedfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labor is not in vain in the Lord.

BLAH BLAH BLAH

2008-01-05T20:10:00.000-05:00

That's how I'm feeling today. I haven't been doing much, just loafing around the house. Today wasn't so bad actually. I felt OK but I didn't go anywhere. I'm having a major problem with eating. I haven't had an appetite for about a week now. Of course, not eating isn't helping increase my energy level. Today all I ate was a waffle, a cup of soup and some saltines. I told my doctor I didn't have an appetite and he said it's normal for this part of my treatment. I have some Ensure meal supplements so I'm going to start drinking those if my appetite doesn't improve.

I really have nothing else to report. I'm just counting down the days until radiation is over--just 11 days to go. The monotony of going everyday is wearing on me. I know it's necessary but it's getting old. Plus, I'm just tired of being tired all the time! My doctor says it will be several weeks before my strength is back up. I still have to check with my other oncologist to see how the chemotherapy alone will affect me. I'm told to expect some side effects including fatigue but I hope it won't be as severe as with the radiation.

I'll try to post tomorrow if I have the energy. If not I'll definitely post Monday.

Love to all!
Chanda

Hebrew 11:6
And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

HAPPY NEW YEAR (TWO DAYS LATE)

2008-01-03T11:56:00.000-05:00

Sorry I've been lax in my posting. We had company on New Year's Day. Since 2000, we've hosted family and friends for a New Year's dinner and laughs. It's always fun. This year was no different though we did miss seeing my cousin Dooley and his wife Paryn and their three kids. Paryn and one of the boys were under the weather so they couldn't come. (We sure did miss y'all!) But, the show must go on. We feasted on a homemade meal of chicken, chitlins, collards, black eye peas, Mexican cornbread, red velvet cake, and another dessert called blueberry delight (some of my cousins have renamed it "blueberry yum-yum" because it's sooooo good).

I was fatigued on New Year's Day but managed to get a burst of energy in the afternoon so I could socialize with everyone. Yesterday, I was knocked out after radiation for several hours. Today, I'm doing pretty well. I have to remember to eat every 3 or 4 hours to keep my energy level up. I'm still a little lethargic today but it's manageable.

I saw my radiation oncologist yesterday and he's pleased with my progress. He decreased my steroid dosage to just half a pill a day. He thinks the lower steroid dosage coupled with my being on radiation for five weeks now is responsible for the fatigue I'm experiencing. I'll be finished exactly two weeks from now. The doctor says I should be feeling like my old self about 3 weeks after I finish. I can't wait! I'll have another MRI in March to see how much the tumor has shrunk. I'm already claiming victory over this tumor. I KNOW IT'S SHRINKING!

Well, I'm about to eat lunch then take a nap. Smokey is hanging out with me right now. I'm sure he'll also be up for a nap this afternoon.

Before I go, a birthday shout-out to my friend Stacey. Happy Birthday, girl!

Love to all,
Chanda

1 Peter 5:7
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

GOODBYE 2007

2007-12-31T13:34:00.000-05:00

I can't believe 2007 is almost over. It sure went by fast. The last month or so of this year has definitely been life-changing for me in ways I never expected. Clearly, I never thought I would be diagnosed with a brain tumor and be undergoing radiation and chemo as this year wrapped up. But going through this trial, I know that I'll be ready for anything when it's all over. I know from experience that as a Christian, going through trials only increases your faith. For instance, in 2001 my father died and it was devastating for me, Loren and Mommy. I thought I'd never get over it. But, God saw us through. Today would have been Daddy's 69th birthday. We went to the cemetery earlier and put a plant by his grave. A few years ago, I would have cried all day but now my faith has increased. I know God has made a place for Daddy in His kingdom and that gives me comfort. Of course I miss Daddy but I know God loves him best and Daddy's soul is at rest.

I'm now more than halfway through radiation. I have just 12 more treatments to go. I should regain my strength a couple of weeks after I'm done. I haven't just been tired in the last week; I'm experiencing FATIGUE! There is a differnce my friends. Fatigue causes me to sleep nearly all day and then all night! Fatigue causes my legs to get so heavy that I can barely lift them and it makes me so tired that I can't even hold my purse. I feel like an old lady! I look forward to January 17th--the date of my last radiation treatment. I am circling the date on my calendar!

Today I did something I said I wouldn't do.... I bought a wig! I've been a little down about my changing appearance. My hair has fallen out in a rather haphazard pattern that makes it hard to style. Loren and Mommy convinced me to go the wig shop to try out a few styles. I initially looked at some very natural looking wigs that you can cut into any style you like. I liked them a lot until I realized they cost $599! I opted for a cheaper, I mean, less expensive alternative and found a style I really like. I don't plan on wearing it everyday though. I like the scarves so I'll just use both to change up my look from day to day.

Happy New Year, everyone. I'm looking forward to making 2008 my best year yet!
Chanda

2 Corinthians 9:8
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

SHORT AND SWEET

2007-12-29T16:34:00.000-05:00

This will be short and sweet because I'm a bit tired today. I went to radiation this morning to make up for one of the days I missed this week (we were off for Christmas eve and Christmas). I took a two and a half hour nap after I got home and I'm ready for another nap right now! I don't feel bad just tired is all. Smokey, being the ever loyal cat that he is, has stuck by my side all day. When I sleep, he sleeps. When I get up, he gets up. When I eat, he eats. Actually this isn't unusual. He ALWAYS sticks by my side but that's why I love him!

OK. I'm off for another nap!

Love to all!
Chanda

Romans 5:1
Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ

I'M BACK!

2007-12-28T16:58:00.000-05:00

Hello all,
I took an unexpected vacation from the blog. This week has been busy. We've had a lot of company this week and I've enjoyed seeing relatives and friends. My friend Mel drove up from Orlando yesterday with her mom. It was great to see her and I was so touched that she drove such a long way to see me for such a short visit. Thanks Mel.

I ran into a computer issue that disrupted my blogging this week. I've misplaced the AC adapter for my laptop and it's out of juice. After several days of fruitless searches, I've decided to buy a new AC adapter. I hesitated because I figured as soon as I bought a replacement, I'd find the old one (which will probably happen anyway). In the meantime, I'm using my mom's computer.

Despite the computer issue, this has been a great week. I've been feeling good though a bit tired a times. Now I know I have to pace myself so I don't get exhausted. My back pain is also much better. I scheduled a massage at a spa in Peachtree City last Saturday at 9:00 am. But, when I showed up for my appointment, the receptionist told me the appointment was for the 29th not the 22nd. That was their mistake because I made the appointment last Friday and specifically asked for an appointment the next day. The receptionist basically gave me a "sucks to be you" smirk and sent me on my way! Mommy suggested I make an appointment at another spa in Peachtree City and they were able to fit me in. Later that day, the original spa called to apologize for the inconvenience then called back to offer me a gift card for a free massage. SCORE! They can inconvenience me anytime!

I've lost even more hair this week. The bald spot is really growing! It started in the back of my head on the left side but today a big clump of hair came out in the middle. So I'm now wearing scarves. Loren gave me a beautiful assortment of Coach scarves for Christmas. She also bought me two new pairs of earrings to further accessorize my new look. Today, one of the technicians at the radiation clinic told me she liked my look and that it was "sassy!" -) I've also lost 3 pounds in the last week. It's the organic eating. I eat what I want but only organic foods. Granted, the sugar-free organic sweet potato pie I made for Christmas was not even close to Grandma's recipe, but it'll do. I'll take a temporary break from the organic eating on New Year's Day to eat collard greens and black-eyed peas. That's a tradional meal for good luck for us Southerners.

See y'all tomorrow!

Chanda

Matthew 17:20
"Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

NOT A GOOD DAY

2007-12-23T12:29:00.000-05:00

I didn't blog yesterday because I just didn't have it in me. I tried a couple of times but there was nothing there. Then last evening I had a major breakdown. Yesterday marked four weeks since I had the seizure and learned I have a brain tumor and the weight of it all came crashing down on me. My mom was here to witness my sobbing, ugly cries, and stuffed up nose. It wasn't pretty but I suppose it was a necessary step in this process. I know everyone thinks I'm being so brave and amazing and strong but as I told my mom, that's not me, that's ALL GOD! He's carrying me and giving me strength. I would never be able to do that alone.

Part of what makes all of this so hard for me is my lost of independence. I can't drive because of the possibilty of my having another seizure, so I have to ask someone for a ride anytime I want to do something. Sometimes I feel like I'm five years old! It's also hard seeing my body weaken. I now have to get a shopping cart when I go into the store just to hold my purse. I'm also noticing some physical changes, aside from the hair loss. The steroid I'm taking has caused my face to swell. I look like I'm storing nuts for winter in my cheeks! The steroid also causes acne. I just don't feel really attractive right now.

It's also upsetting to me that my memory isn't what it used to be. My long-term memory is great. I mean, I still remember the dream I had the night before my first day of kindergarten! I was rolling down this big hill with another kid who had a big Afro! I also remember what I wore on the first day of kindergarten--a red striped shirt with blue culottes. A very stylish ensemble for a five-year-old in 1977! OK. You get my drift. However, my short-term memory isn't so reliable these days. Yesterday I went to the bank to cash a check but I couldn't remember where it was. That may not be a big deal to some people but as my family and friends can tell you, I'm a rather organized person who can keep track of a lot of details. So that little episode really upset me.

Despite all this, I still thank God for the blessings I have. I'm grateful for Loren and Mommy who are here to love and support me 24-7. I'm blessed to have a wonderful group of friends and co-workers, and even former co-workers who are praying for me. I'm also grateful that I haven't had any headaches since my doctor decreased my steroid dosages. I really believe the tumor is shrinking and I know that God is healing me right now. My faith isn't wavering, but I had a human moment yesterday.

Onward and upward from here,
Chanda

James 1:2-4
My brothers and sisters, consider it nothing but joy when you fall into all sorts of trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect effect, so that you will be perfect and complete, not deficient in anything.

A SASSY NEW 'DO

2007-12-21T06:53:00.000-05:00

Hey there everybody,
I got a hair cut yesterday to compliment my new bald spot. It's a short, layered bob. I like it. I told my stylist my hair was falling out and that she needed to pull it out to determine how big the bald spot was. Well, when she pulled out a clump of my hair from the root, it freaked her out, which I suppose is normal. She wasn't expecting to be holding a handful of my hair! But, she quickly pulled herself together and hooked me up with a sassy 'do that hides the bald spot. Quite honestly, if you have to have a bald spot, mine is in a good location that's easy to hide. I'll take a picture of my new look and post it later.

This week I've really noticed a drop in my energy level. After I took a bath yesterday morning, I had to rest a moment before I got dressed. The effects of the radiation and chemo have definitely kicked in. But, on a positive note, I haven't been nauseous nearly at all this week. I always take the anti-nausea meds before I take my chemo pills every morning, but the past few days I haven't had to take them later in the day. YIPEE! I also haven't had any headaches, though the neck and back pain persist. I'm buying a back support pillow to use when I'm resting in bed. That should help immensely. I'm also going to try to book a massage today to work out the kinks I have in my back. But, I've been mindful to change my sleeping positions. I've been sleeping on my back and both sides instead of just the left side.

Well, I'm off to get dressed. It's nearly 7:00 am and radiation is at 9:15. Today, my friend Angela is driving me. If I'm up to it, we may do lunch afterward.

Happy Friday,
Chanda

What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!

What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!

O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,

All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

--Lyrics from the hymnal "What a Friend We Have in Jesus"

HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW

2007-12-20T06:13:00.000-05:00

It happened. I lost my first clump of hair yesterday, actually a few clumps. Yesterday afternoon, I was doodling around on the computer when I looked down and saw hair on the bed. I wondered, is that my hair? So I reached back and raked my fingers through my hair and more came out. I told my mom and she came in and looked and asked if I was OK. You know what, I was and I am OK. The doctor had told me to expect the hair loss and it happened pretty much how he said it would. So it wasn't a big surprise or anything. And, it'll grow back eventually. So if I have to lose some hair to get my healing, so be it. Actually I'm going to the salon today. Loren is driving me to my radiation appointment then we're going to the salon. I'm going to get my hair trimmed. I want to make sure I don't have any split ends. I need my hair to continue growing so I can mask the bald spot. Fortunately the other bald spot I have from the biopsy is growing back nicely and it's pretty easy to cover up now.

Still on the hair thing, my friend Stacey sent me a beautiful basket of natural hair care products yesterday. I have shampoo, conditioner, oil, everything. It's all made from natural stuff like grapefruit, geranium, lemongrass, and tangerine. I can't wait to use it. Thanks Stace!

Now I'm dealing with a new problem. A month of bed rest has my neck and back ACHING! I tend to lie on my left side so I have this bad pain on the left side of my neck that extends to my mid-back. I've been stretching to alleviate the pain and now I make a conscious effort to lie on my right side. I think I'll get a massage next week so I can get that pain worked out. I'm also going to get a some kind of pillow so I can have extra support when I'm just resting in bed. I'm also going to talk to my friend Tonya, who's a yoga instructor, to get some ideas on how to get rid of this pain.

Have a great Thursday!
Chanda

Romans 1:17
For therein is the righteousness of God revealed from faith to faith: as it is written, The just shall live by faith.

BABY STEPS, BABY STEPS

2007-12-19T06:19:00.000-05:00

Do you remember the movie "What About Bob?" Bill Murray plays a man with OCD who's driving his doctor, played by Richard Dreyfuss, crazy! The doctor wrote a book called "Baby Steps" discussing his philosophy for treating patients. Bob sees the doctor once in his office before the doctor goes on vacation then Bob tracks him down at his vacation house and the hilarity ensues.

I need to learn to take baby steps myself. Monday, I was all energy. I was out and about, didn't take a nap. Felt great! Tuesday? Not so much. I was dragging big time. I went to radiation then fell asleep in the car on the way home. I followed that up with a nap before my appointment at the oncologist office. By the way, that appointment went well. My blood counts are good so it seems I'm tolerating the chemo really well. Back to my fatigue, I came back home and basically slept all afternoon. So, now I know that even on days when I'm feeling like Wonder Woman, I need to slow it down and force myself to take a nap because I will pay for it the next day.

I saw the radiation oncologist on Monday and he told me to cut back on the Decadron, which is the steroid I'm taking to control the swelling in my brain. He told me to let him know if I start having any headaches, blackouts, or seizures. So far so good which is a GREAT sign! Cutting back on the Decadron also helps me to sleep better. Last night, I woke up just once. WOO HOO!

Overall, I'm feeling pretty good, though I am noticing the "brain fog" that I'm told comes with chemo. I have to write some things down to keep them straight in my head. I have a little notebook with me all the time so I can take notes when I need to.

Have a wonderful Wednesday!
Chanda

Romans 10:17
So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

FRIENDSHP, PART II

2007-12-18T06:22:00.000-05:00

Last Tuesday I talked about friendship and how wonderfully generous and loving my friends are. I felt the need to re-address the issue because my friends continue to amaze me with their love and support during this trial in my life.

First, I'll talk about my bestest friend ever, my big sis Loren. I know y'all are sick of me talking about her, but get over it!! I've been belly-aching about washing my hair and I FINALLY did last night. I washed it with the Treasured Locks All-Natural shampoo and then yelled for Loren to help me set it. Of course, I've been doing Google searches about natural hair care and thought I had it all figured out. WRONG! I didn't have a conditioner to use because the ones I found contained chemicals, which of course help to de-tangle the hair. Well, Loren to the rescue. She opened the fridge, whips out some mayo, then opened the cupboard and got some olive oil. I looked at her like she was crazy. But she explained these natural ingredients would help soften and condition my hair. I left it on my hair about 20 minutes then rinsed it out. I was amazed! My hair was soft and manageable. Now it was time to roller set my hair. Again, Loren had all the answers. She made a cup of green tea and used it as a setting lotion then she plopped me under the dryer on the wig setting (it's just air, no heat). I stayed under there as long as I could (about an hour). My hair was pretty dry but I used softer rollers to set it before I went to bed. This morning, I woke up to a head full o' curls! My hair looks great and it is really soft. Again, a testament to how Loren is always looking out for me even when I think I have it all figured out. She's so much smarter than I am and I'm more than blessed to have her as my sister. GO LOREN, GO LOREN, GO LOREN!

I also got a surprise yesterday from my friend Debbie in Seattle. Debbie and I used to work together at WFTS-TV in Tampa back in the mid-90s. Deb and I haven't even seen each other in 10 years but when she learned about my diagnosis she emailed me and we caught up on the long lost years really fast. After I got the package yesterday, I emailed Deb and thanked her profusely for being so thoughtful and kind. She told me that she only did it to get a shout out in the blog... of course she was kidding!! But I'm shouting out to her anyway. Thanks Deb!

Loren and Mommy also got yet another surprise package yesterday from Santa's little helper Vanessa. Because Vanessa is a breast cancer survivor, she knows that battling cancer isn't just hard on the patient, but it's really hard on the caregivers. My mother was practically speechless after Vanessa's package arrived. First it was packaged in beautiful wrapping which gets Mommy right away. She practically stared at it all afternoon. I'M NOT KIDDING! I told Vanessa that's she's now my mom's third daughter!

Stephanie and I had a great time yesterday too. She drove me to radiation then we ran some errands and ate lunch at Whole Foods. We had the best time reminiscing about high school. Back then, we had a few classes together including drivers ed. We both remembered the same incident about this kid in our class named Doug who nearly killed us one morning when he blew through a stop sign in downtown Newnan. It's funny now but then I really did think Doug was going to kill us back then. It's great to have Steph as a friend again. It's a shame we had lost touch for so many years!

That's really the point I'm trying to make. Having this brain tumor has been a blessing in many regards. Being faced with such a serious diagnosis has forced me to examine what is really important in life and it's not the stuff that many of us covet. I now know that having the love of God, family and friends supersedes anything else. Seriously, nothing else at all matters. I can't imagine trying to battle cancer alone. I am empowered because I know God is carrying me every step of the way, and I also know that my family and friends are praying for me and willing to do whatever I need to make my battle a little easier. I have never felt more loved in my life!

Love to all,
Chanda

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

IT'S BEGINNING TO LOOK (AND FEEL) A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS

2007-12-17T06:22:00.000-05:00

Good morning!

Can you believe we're just eight days away from Christmas? Where did the time go? Last week, we were basking in 70 degree temps here in Atlanta. This morning, it's in the 20s. What a difference a week makes.

It's also looking like Christmas everywhere... Christmas trees, decorations, music.... I love it! Church was wonderful yesterday. Our male chorus sang O Holy Night, Silent Night, Joy to the World. Speaking of music, Christian, my EP at CNN sent me a Christmas CD that I've been playing. Thanks, Christian!

This weekend, I felt pretty good. Saturday, Mommy and I ran a few errands. We visited the Healthy Habit store here in Newnan and got a few supplies. I've been reading about cancer and diet and decided to cut out refined sugars, since they only feed cancer cells. So, I bought some Stevia (a natural sweetener), pure organic maple syrup, and unrefined honey. I'll use these to sweeten my foods from now on. Yesterday, I went to Whole Foods after church and I was like a kid in a candy store! Sure, I've been to Whole Foods a gazillion times but this was the first time I'd been there as an organic foodie. The selection is amazing and the prices are good, comparatively speaking. Sadly, it's really expensive to eat organic. No wonder most people don't. But, I must tell you, organic food is way cheaper than chemo so I plan to keep up my new lifestyle.

Today, it's back to the radiation grind. I'll be there for my usual 9:15 appointment. My friend Stephanie is driving me today. We're going to run a few errands after that, then have lunch. I also hope to see my friend Val today or maybe tomorrow. She's in town for a few days and it's been a while since we've seen each other. It'll be nice to see her. Again, one of the good things to come of this is that I'm connecting with a lot of people I haven't seen in a really long time.

I hope everyone has a great Monday!

Chanda

Psalm 121:1-2
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.
My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth.

HAIR TODAY....

2007-12-15T07:59:00.000-05:00

Good Saturday morning to you.

Today I'm planning to wash my hair and I expect it to be a project. As I mentioned last week, I cannot use any heat or chemicals on my hair while I'm receiving radiation. So far, I don't have any hair loss but I am expecting some as the radiation continues. Usually brain tumor patients lose their hair in the spot where they're receiving radiation. Considering I have a brain tumor, I do not plan to get a chemical relaxer ever again. Doesn't seem prudent to have chemicals seeping into my head, don't you think?

In the meantime, I have to try to come up with a hairdo that's somewhat stylish. I will probably cut my hair down the road, but for now, I don't plan to. I want to wait to see how much hair I lose and whether it'll be better to keep the length to camouflage a bald spot.

Thanks to everyone who's emailed or called with natural hair care suggestions. I'll let you know how things turn out and probably post a picture of the final product. Speaking of pictures, you'll notice I've posted pictures of my radiation mask. I thought y'all would want to see what it's like to get radiation. I have to wear that mask covering my face while it's snapped on the table. I lie down during the treatments. I usually keep my eyes close and pray and say my RADIATION - ERADICATION cheer. And, then it's over before I know it!

Other than that, I'm feeling OK. Yesterday I was somewhat tired. I guess I paid for the great day I had on Thursday. I was pretty lethargic yesterday. I took a nap yesterday afternoon then I was in the bed around 7 pm. I woke up a couple of times before I finally got up this morning around 5:30.

I'm looking forward to a more energetic day today.... I won't be running any marathons but I hope to manage a little walk outside.

Love to all!
Chanda

Ephesians 2:8
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—

T.G.I.F.

2007-12-14T06:16:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday, all!

I had a great day yesterday--felt really good! Plus I made a new Internet friend. Oscar lives in Oakland, California, and like me he's been diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiforme IV (we'll call it GBM IV for short, here on out). Oscar found my blog and emailed me with an encouraging word and a WEALTH of information about alternative treatments, diet, support, you name it! I can't tell you how excited I was to get my hands on some information on how to beat this thing.

For starters, Oscar told me about a nutritionist who specializes in treating people with brain tumors. As soon as Oscar told me about her, I made contact and she got right back to me. I have a lot of paperwork to fill out for her before she develops a comprehensive diet plan for me. In the meantime, I'm going organic. No need to put more poison in my body, ya know?

Oscar also told me about a doctor in India who doesn't just talk about treating brain tumors, he's talking about CURING them. He has a homeopathic approach that many American doctors snub their noses at. Ugh! They're not the ones hearing you have a 1-2% chance of living with a GBM IV past five years! Anyway, this Indian doctor, Dr. Banerji, has done promising research and collaborated with doctors at the MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, Texas. My friend Laura is a doctor so I've asked her to help me muddle through some of the research but I'm very encouraged to learn about Dr. Banerji's work. Oscar takes Dr. Banerji's treatments and his tumor is SHRINKING! I'll let you know more when I make contact with Dr. Banerji. I've also read more about Dr. Banerji and how he's helping other GBM IV patients here in the U.S. and it's all very encouraging. I feel God is leading me in the fight direction to be 100% healed of my tumor.

So, today I'm looking forward to another day of feeling great. Loren is going to drop me off at my radiation appointment this morning and my friend Ronni is going to drive me back home. One good thing that has come out of this is that I'm spending a lot more quality time with friends and family! :-)

Have a great day, everyone!

Chanda

Matthew 9:20-22

20 And, behold, a woman, which was diseased with an issue of blood twelve years, came behind him, and touched the hem of his garment:
21 For she said within herself, If I may but touch his garment, I shall be whole.
22 But Jesus turned him about, and when he saw her, he said, Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole. And the woman was made whole from that hour.

A BIT O' GOOD NEWS

2007-12-13T06:12:00.000-05:00

Good Thursday morning to you!

I have a couple of good tidbits to share this morning. I mentioned earlier this week how I've done Google searches about the kind of tumor I have and by and large, the news is quite depressing. But I stumbled on a website that featured cancer survivor stories. So, I sent an email asking for even more miracle stories. Yesterday I got a reply directing me to a true miracle story about a man named david m. bailey (he intentionally doesn't capitalize his name). He received the same diagnosis as I did (Glioblastoma Multiforme Stage IV) and was told he had six months to live. That was back in 1996! He has a website chronicling his story (http://www.davidmbailey.com/) and how his diagnosis has completely changed his life. I know God has a similar plan for me. I pray that God will continue to bless david with His healing power. It's not as if we need proof, but david's story serves as such that God is able to conquer anything! HE IS IN CONTROL!

And there's even more good news! Loren has been taking the lead role in helping me get 100% insurance coverage for my chemo. Normally, doctors prescribe it in a 5-day cycle, but my oncologist has me on a 28-day cycle. A pharmacist named Denise at Piedmont Apothecary has been so patient and diligent in working with my doctor to finagle my benefits to the fullest, but we hit a road block on Monday. I was forced to pay nearly $512 for 10 pills! Isn't that OUTRAGEOUS?! Again, Loren had been working with my the nurse and insurance coordinator at my oncologist office and yesterday I received a call telling me they were able to get a 30-day supply 100% covered. GOD IS GOOD!

So, I'm looking forward to another great day. I'm thankful that I'm feeling pretty strong. The nausea last night wasn't horrible. I had a pretty restful night's sleep. I haven't had any headaches for at least two weeks now. I still experience some double vision at times, but it subsides in about five minutes. Overall, I have lots to be thankful for so I'm giving God the praise.

Have a great day, everyone!
Chanda

Psalm 150:6
Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM

2007-12-12T06:12:00.000-05:00

That's right. Today is my mother's birthday. You'd never guess how old she is (OK she's 67. Don't tell her I told you!) She's one sassy senior, let me tell you. She wears a size 8, loves to stay up late and to laugh and hang out with me, Loren and our friends. As I mentioned yesterday, Mommy is recovering from a heart attack. She was diagnosed with Graves Disease in October then had a heart attack related to the condition, though she didn't realize it at the time. She spent six days in Piedmont Hospital (just as I did) and is still under the doctors' care. Thank God her heart is no worse for the wear from the heart attack, but she's still dealing with some eyesight problems because of the Graves disease. She's probably going to have surgery next month to remove her thyroid so we're prayerful that will help correct the problems she's been experiencing. Yes, it's been a trying time for the Taylor Family as of late, but we're not letting it get us down. We're still praising God for bringing us thus far.

Last night was a little rough for me. It seems the nausea is the worst right before bed. I'm not sure why. But I do think I got more sleep last night than I have been getting because I feel more rested this morning. I also managed a nap yesterday.

As I told you yesterday, my high school friend Stephanie drove me to my radiation appointment. We had a great time catching up on 17 years of lost time! After radiation, I had an appointment with the other oncologist. They checked my vitals which were all great, including my blood pressure. I've been hypertensive for a few years and have struggled to keep it under control. However, since I've gotten cancer, my BP is great! Don't you love it?! My blood count was good too. The chemo hasn't affected my immune system yet so I guess all of my manic hand washing is helping.

One final note, there's another birthday in the Taylor household today, well sort of. Because it really annoys my mother, I've designated December 12th as Smokey's birthday. I got him in February 1998 when he was eight weeks old, so I know he was born in December 1997. So I just decided December 12th would be his birthday. Happy 10th birthday, Smokester! I'll be giving him some canned food today instead of the usual dry stuff as a birthday treat.

Happy Hump Day!
Chanda

James 5:14-15 (King James Version)
"Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord:
And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him."

FRIENDSHIP

2007-12-11T05:49:00.000-05:00

Good Tuesday morning to you!

You'll notice I've added some pictures of actual people to this page! I posted two pictures of my mom and my sister - my two best friends ever! We've always been close but especially so since my father died in 2001. And, now we're all roomies, a somewhat unorthodox setup, but it's working for us, especially now that I'm a cancer patient.

And, let me tell you, I have the best mom in the world! Even though she's recovering from a heart attack herself, she's waiting on me hand and foot. Actually I wish she'd slow it down a bit, but she won't listen. I'm her "baby" and she there's nothing she won't do for me. Home cooked meals, back rubs, you name it and she's doing it. A simple thanks doesn't seem sufficient.

And then there's Loren. She's the best sister in the world! When we were little and I would get into trouble, Loren would take the blame for me so I wouldn't get a spanking! She's still my biggest advocate. She does stuff that I need done before I even ask. Again, I have no words to express how much I love her and always will.

I am blessed to have some wonderful, supportive sister-friends, too. I'm thankful to have my circle of college friends back in my life. Melodie, Stacey, Tonya, Laura, and I all became friends in 1990 when we were freshmen at Northwestern University. Back then, we called ourselves the "Freshmen Black Women's Posse" (whatever that meant) and we rolled together all of the time! After graduation, the five of us drifted apart, but God has brought us all back together again. We haven't all seen each other since graduation but we email and call each other all of the time. We're planning a reunion for 2008 and I can't wait to see everyone. Girls, please know I can feel the love from all of you all of the time.

Another long lost friend is Stephanie. We graduated from Newnan High in 1990. I can't remember the last time we've seen each other, but again God reunited us earlier this year. She sent me an email via classmates.com and we've corresponded since. When she heard about my illness, she readily volunteered to help. So, this morning she's going to drive me to my radiation appointment. Thanks, Stephanie!

Then, there's my friend Deidra. She's a busy anchorwoman and mommy but not too busy to volunteer to drive me to radiation appointments or do whatever else I need or want. I think she'd even dance a jig to make me laugh. Love ya D!

My friend Vanessa is also a busy anchorwoman, but she's also a breast cancer survivor and now advocate. Since my diagnosis, she's been like Santa. I get something from her in the mail everyday, not to mention all of the advice she readily supplies about being a cancer patient. She's even sent my mother and sister stuff! Vanessa is now using her voice to help other cancer patients. She started a non-profit called Compassionate Hands and Hearts. It's based in Central Florida. I've put a link on the blog so check it out and donate if you can. Vanessa is an ANGEL!

I'm also grateful for JaQuitta, another anchorwoman friend who's also a breast cancer survivor. JaQuitta and I hadn't talked in ages, but when she heard I had cancer, she picked up the phone to call me and offer her support. Last night, we had a great conversation about how cancer really changes your life. She really touched me when she volunteered to drive me to a radiation appointment even though she just finished chemo herself. JaQuitta, you're a class act! For those of you who live in the Atlanta area, you probably know that JaQuitta is blogging about her cancer experience, too. There's a link on this page, so check it out and send her a word of encouragement.

There are other friends who have reached out to me as well and I apologize for not mentioning everyone by name, but please know every act of kindness means more to me than I could ever express.

Today I'll leave you with a scripture that my friend Gennette sent to me.

Love to all!
Chanda

Psalm 91:14-16
"Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name. He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him, and shew him my salvation."

“I’M SO GLAD THAT TROUBLE DON’T LAST ALWAYS”

2007-12-10T06:21:00.000-05:00

The title today comes from the words of a Negro spiritual. And although not grammatically correct, the lyrics are true. I know that things are not ideal now, but a better day is ahead. And, what a great day I had yesterday! I went to church and even though I had a mild bout with nausea during the service, (not to mention some wicked hot flashes), it was great to be there and hear a word from God.

One of the associate ministers preached about walking by faith and not by sight. You know she had my attention right there! She told us how sight constantly reminds us of all the obstacles we face in life, the impossibilities, and the hardships! You might as well give up! Whereas faith assures us though things are rough now, there’s a stronger force out there working in our favor to turn things around. No, we can’t see it, but if you’re a believer, you feel it and TRUST that it’s there.

I’m among the latter these days. I do faithfully believe, no, I KNOW , that God is with me every step of the way. Lest anyone be mistaken, I’m well aware of the seriousness of my illness. My doctor told me that the type of tumor I have, could kill me in 12 to 15 months. I’ve also held my breath and Googled it and let me tell you, the stats are not on my side. But, GOD IS! And, that’s good enough for me. I look forward to the day when I'm telling everyone about the miracle of how God cured me of this awful tumor!

Before I go, thanks to everyone who has left a comment or emailed me. I love that. It really brightens my sometimes monotonous day.

For now, I'm off to get ready for my radiation at 9:15. If you're reading this around that time, think about me and say my little cheer with me... RADIATION = ERADICATE! That's one of the things I whisper to myself when I'm getting my treatments.

Love to all!
Chanda

2 Corinthians 5:7
For we walk by faith, not by sight.

MY NEW ROUTINE

2007-12-09T06:39:00.000-05:00

It's 6:40 am and I've already done my morning meditation, eaten breakfast, checked the headlines, and now I'm writing my blog!

My new morning routine consists of getting up at 5:30. This morning, I washed up, brushed my teeth, then fed Smokey. (Cats gotta eat, too!)

But before I can eat, I have to check my blood sugar. I'm on a steroid called Decadron that helps control the swelling in my brain from the tumor. However, the medication causes my blood sugar to increase. I have to check it before meals and if it's 140 or above, I have to give myself insulin. This morning it was 140 so I gave myself two units of insulin before I ate. The worst part about the blood sugar monitoring is sticking my finger. I HATE THAT! However, I'm getting used to it.

With that matter over, I fixed my breakfast (turkey bacon and frozen whole wheat waffles with sugar-free syrup) and took three of my daily pills. The goal is to finish breakfast by 6:15 because I have to take my chemo pills by 8:15, which is an hour before my radiation treatments during the week. It's best to take the chemo pills on an empty stomach so I have to give my breakfast a couple of hours to digest. At 7:45 I will take two anti-nausea medicines and they are a must. I can feel the chemo pills trying to make me sick as soon as I swallow those puppies. YUCK!

Here's my daily drug routine:
Midnight - 3 pills
6:00 am - 3 pills
7:45 - 2 pills
8:15 - 4 pills
Noon - 1 pill
4:00 - 1 pill
6:00 - 1 pill

So I never go more than 6 hours without having to take something. In between I take the anti-nausea medicine every four hours as needed, usually before I eat. I learned the other night that not doing that was a huge mistake! I felt sick for hours after I ate dinner then realized I should have taken the anti-nausea meds sooner.

I'm also a germ-phobe now. Because the chemo causes my white blood cell count to go down, I have to wash my hands constantly! I'm also using Clorox wipes to clean surfaces before I touch them. I absolutely don't want to end up in the hospital with an infection so everything around me gets the white glove treatment. I'm also taking antibiotics three days a week to help fight any infections... yet another pill!

I think I'll go to church this morning. I'm feeling pretty good, which seems to be the norm in the morning. But, later in the day, I'm absolutely POOPED! By 9:00 pm, you can stick a fork in me because I'm done! Ironically, though I'm tired, one of the side effects of the chemo is insomnia. How cruel! So of course, I do wake up a couple of times throughout the night.

I hope everyone has a great day. Take time to thank God for all of your blessings, no matter how big or small!

Chanda

Psalm 100:

Make a joyful noise unto the LORD, all ye lands.
Serve the LORD with gladness: come before his presence with singing.
Know ye that the LORD he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.
For the LORD is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.

=============================================

LAST DAY FOR THE CHRISTMAS HOUSE!
La Maison Enchantée
895 W. Paces Ferry Road, Atlanta
Tours today are from 1:00 to 5:00 pm
Make sure you don't miss seeing the guest suite on the terrace level.
It was designed by Loren Taylor of Anna Abrams Design.

For more info:
http://www.alliancetheatre.org/performance.aspx?id=2300&subsec=ES

THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET HAIRY!

2007-12-08T06:14:00.000-05:00

Good morning everyone!

Today I'm discussing a very real problem I'm about to encounter - my hair! Because I'm receiving radiation treatments on my brain, I cannot put any chemicals or heat on my hair. This presents a challenge for me because I use relaxers and heat to straighten my hair. It's been six weeks or so since my last relaxer and I usually get them every eight weeks, so my hair is about to get a little messy. Truth be told, it ain't pretty now!

To complicate matters, I have a bald spot now. When I had the biopsy last week, the neurosurgeon had to shave a portion of my head. It's near the top of my head and about the size of a half dollar. Mommy says the hair is already starting to grow back. But, I still have to be cognizant of the fact that I need a comb-over. Who'da thunk?!

One of the nurses at the radiation oncology clinic also told me to use very gentle shampoo on my hair, something like Johnson's Baby Shampoo. I surfed around yesterday and found a black hair care equivalent made by Treasured Locks that is all natural, no chemicals. I'm going to try it out and hope it leaves my hair somewhat manageable. Loren suggested I wash my hair then use cloth rollers to air-dry it and create a curly 'do. Mmmm.. we'll see how that turns out.

I can also expect some hair loss due to the radiation and chemo. My doctor said my hair will eventually thin along the left and back of my head where I'm getting the radiation. Fortunately, the kind of chemo I'm on doesn't always result in total hair loss. I'm told to expect some thinning but not necessarily baldness. I may end up having to cut my hair to make it look presentable, which is OK. It's just hair. It'll grow back.

Funny thing is, I was talking to an old friend the other day and she asked me how my hair was these days. As luck would have it, it's THRIVING! It's never been thicker, grows all the time, minimal breakage. Figures something like cancer would go mess things up! LOL!

So, I'm opening up the floor for suggestions. Anyone got any hair care solutions for me? Maybe a really good natural hair salon that I can try out? Any good natural products I can use? (Remember, NO CHEMICALS!) Please don't suggest wigs. I'm not a wig person. I sweat in my head and I know I'll be out, get hot, and snatch that wig right off my head and scare young children. We don't want that.

Have a great weekend.

Chanda

Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

=============================================

REMINDER!

Don't forget about the Christmas House! It's located at 895 West Paces Ferry Road in Buckhead, right across from Pace Academy. Tours today are from 10 am to 5pm and tomorrow from 1pm to 5pm. Loren will be there so if you go please say hi!

Here's the link for more info on tickets and parking.

http://www.alliancetheatre.org/performance.aspx?id=2300&subsec=ES

IT'S FRIDAY Y'ALL!

2007-12-07T06:18:00.000-05:00

Good morning!
I'm up and at 'em already. I think I may be turning into a morning person! I just ate breakfast and took part of my morning meds. Now, I'm drinking my vitamin water. It's the energy/tropical citrus flavor. I went to CVS yesterday to get the Smart water but they didn't have it so I settled for this. However, I really like it.

Yesterday I had a pleasant surprise after I finished up radiation. My sister Loren drove me to my appointment on her way to work then my friend Deidra met us there so she could drive me home. After my appointment, Deidra and I stopped by Starbucks. While we were standing in line, I saw my cousin Dooley (uh, I mean Charles) standing there! So, he joined us and we chatted over coffee and lattes for about an hour. It was nice to get out and be somewhat normal for an hour. Later in the day, Mom and I went for a brief walk. It was crisp and cool outside and the air felt good in my lungs. I've got to get that walk in everyday to keep my strength up.

Finally before I go, I'm cheerleading for Loren this weekend. She's an interior designer with her own firm called Anna Abrams Design. It's named after our maternal grandmother. Loren is one of the featured designers in this year's Christmas House here in Atlanta. It's a $7 million mansion in Buckhead on W. Paces Ferry Road. Loren designed the guest suite on the terrace level (vestibule, bedroom and bathroom) and it's FABULOUS. If you're in metro Atlanta, please go check it out this weekend and tell all of your friends, co-workers, family, etc. to do so as well. Tour tickets are $17 in advance and $20 at the door. The tours end this Sunday at 5:00 pm.
Here's a link so you can read more about how to get tickets.

http://www.alliancetheatre.org/performance.aspx?id=2300&subsec=ES

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GO AND SUPPORT LOREN!!

I'm attaching some pictures of the room so you can oooh and ahhh over her creative genius. (That's for you Kevin, since you complained about only having cat pictures!)

Make it a good one today!
Chanda

Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

FAITH VS. FEAR

2007-12-06T05:51:00.000-05:00

Good morning and Happy Thursday!

I just woke up to my TV and it was tuned into the Kenneth Copeland show and they're talking about faith versus fear. How appropriate for me these days. Clearly in the situation I'm in, it would be easy to give into the spirit of fear and let it overwhelm me. I could allow myself to be afraid of dying instead of trusting in God knowing that it is He that is in charge, and not me, the doctors, nurses, or anything or anyone else. My pastor always says where there is faith there is no room for fear. Amen!

Well I've gotta run. I have to eat early so I can take my chemo drugs later this morning on an empty stomach. I did experience some slight nausea last night/early this morning but I took some more anti-nausea meds before I went to bed and they did the trick.

Have a great day everyone!

Chanda

Isaiah 2:12 Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the
LORD JEHOVAH is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation.

ONE DOWN, 29 TO GO

2007-12-05T12:01:00.001-05:00

Good afternoon everyone,
I'm back at home from my first radiation appointment. As Vanessa had told me, it wasn't very eventful. I lay on the table, they clamped me down with the mesh hoodie thing over my head, then the machine moved around my head. The technicians came in periodically to make adjustments and I was done in about 10-15 minutes.

I also took my first chemo pills today. I strongly advise not getting cancer because it's so expensive. A five-day supply of drugs cost over $1200! Thank God for good insurance because my co-pay was just $80 but again we're talking a 5-day supply. DANG! I'm just venting. I think it's a shame the way pharmaceutical companies are making a mint over other people's misfortunes, though.

My doctor told me I should be able to tell today whether the chemo is going to make me nauseous. So far, so good. I took two anti-nausea pills before the chemo as a precaution and that will be the drill every day.

I'm also drinking tons of Smart Water because it has electrolytes. The nurse said the chemo may affect my immune system and the extra stuff in the Smart Water will help keep me healthy.

Finally today, a MAJOR shout out to my sister Loren and my mom Carolyn. They're my ROCKS! I love them more than I can say and they are leaving me wanting for nothing. I LOVE YOU BOTH!!!

OK. I'm off for a catnap and some mindless TV viewing.

Until tomorrow.....

Chanda

Romans 8:28
"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."

RADIATION/CHEMO DAY #1

2007-12-05T06:41:00.001-05:00

Good morning everyone:
I'm up early because I have my first radiation appointment at 9:15. I also take my first dose of chemo today.

While I don't know exactly how the treatments will make me feel, I'm anxious to get started and to be healed. I know God is already doing his part so it's time for me to do mine too.

I've also gotten so much support from family and friends, including several people who've been through or are going through what I am now. My friend Vanessa said it best: GOD IS BIGGER THAN CANCER!

I'll update later today.

Chanda

(Today I'll leave you with my Daddy's favorite Bible verse)

Psalm 27:1
"The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?"

THE SEARCH FOR CHEMO

2007-12-04T20:12:00.000-05:00

What a day... two doctors appointments and the search for chemo!
First I went to my hematology-oncology appointment to get the prescription for my chemo. After filling out mounds of paperwork, waiting and waiting some more, I finally saw the doctor then the nurse who instructed me on how to take my chemo drugs.

Then it was off to Piedmont for another appointment at the radiation oncology clinic. I had to lie through another fitting for the radiation cap. It's a mesh thing that covers my entire head and is snapped onto the table on which I am lying. I felt like Hannibal Lector.. (Clarice!)

Anyway, after the appointment we stopped by the pharmacy to get my meds, or so we thought. Apparently pharmacies don't stock the kind of chemo I'll be taking because it's EXTREMELY EXPENSIVE! We called at least 10 places and no one had it. Finally my sister thought to call Piedmont Hospital's pharmacy and I'll be able to pick up my meds there in the morning when I arrive for my first radiation appointment.

I'm tired because I'm not sleeping through the night. I keep having to wake up to take medication.. so that's it for today.

I'll let you know how tomorrow goes... but I think everything will be just fine.

Chanda

Philippians 4:11
"Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, [therewith] to be content."

THE POWER OF FAITH

2007-12-03T19:23:00.000-05:00

Today I wanted to share with you the story of how I ended up back in Georgia.
As you may or may not know, I moved to Orlando in August 2005 after I got an executive producer position at WFTV, the Cox TV station in Orlando. I had been a producer at WSB, the Cox flagship here in Atlanta for six and a half years. So I was off to Orlando for a new adventure and it wasn’t all that I had hoped. Moving to a new city in my mid-30s proved to be more challenging than I had expected. Orlando is more of a family-friendly town, not really the kind of place for a young, happening single black professional woman like myself to meet another young, happening single guy. I went out with a couple of guys but I soon realized Mr. Right or even Mr. Right Now was not in Central Florida.

Additionally, I was working the dreaded graveyard shift (11:00 pm to 9:00 am) and it quickly wore on my body. I was always tired, sleep-deprived and grumpy. Sometimes I even got on my own nerves! Now that’s pitiful!

Anyway, earlier this year, I began to realize I needed to make a change but didn’t know what to do… so I turned it over to God. I prayed for His guidance and wisdom to lead me in the right direction. After weeks of praying I heard the Lord speaking so very clearly to me and He told me to quit my job and move back home. I wanted to make sure I was hearing right so I talked back to Him… I asked "you do realize I don’t have another job?" And, He said "YES! Quit your job and move back home. I will provide!"

I took Him at His word and handed in my resignation at the end of May. My last day at WFTV was August first. During my last two months in O-Town I looked and applied for many jobs and got nary a response. The only company who called me back was CNN. Because I was under contract at my job in Orlando, CNN wouldn’t proceed with any talks until I got a release from my contract there. Again I asked the Lord for guidance and He told me the release would be granted, and it was. Again, my last day in Orlando was August 1st. CNN offered me a job on August 7th. I started there August 20th.

I share this story to help you understand why I am so confident of the power of God’s faithfulness. Many people thought I was absolutely out of my mind to quit my job without a new one, but I knew stepping out on faith was the right thing to do. And, now I know why. I can’t imagine what may have happened to me had I been alone in my apartment in Orlando with only my cat Smokey to call for help! God brought me back to my mother’s house for a reason and now it is crystal clear.

I leave you with the words of one of my favorite hymnals that I often hum and sing, just as my Grandma used to do:
"Great is Thy faithfulness!Great is Thy faithfulness! Morning by morning new mercies I see. All I have needed Thy hand hath provided; Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!"

Until tomorrow,
Chanda
P.S.
Please forgive any typos or misspellings. Y’all know my eyesight is a little funky in my right eye because of this tumor. So, forgive a sista!

First Post

2007-12-02T19:07:00.000-05:00

Welcome to my blog! I decided to create this to share this experience with you all.

First, the latest and greatest on what's going on with me.
I've been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. I begin chemotherapy and radiation this week. I ended up in the hospital on Saturday, November 24th after I had a seizure. I had gone to bed the previous night with a really bad headache. I took a couple of Tylenol and laid down then I was seeing double on my right side. WEIRD! I eventually fell asleep after saying my prayers but woke up at 2:00 am with the same headache. So, I took a couple of Ibuprofen and went to the restroom and prayed for God to take away this pain! I stayed up for a while but eventually fell asleep or passed out. The next thing I knew I was in the emergency room. My mom said around 3:30 am, a loud noise awoke her and she heard me snoring in a very loud and unusual manner in my room. She came in to see if I was alright and found me lying face down in my bed. She tried to wake me but couldn't so she called for my sister. They pinched me, poured cold water on my face, but couldn't wake me up so they called 911. They told me that I was awake by the time the paramedics arrived but I couldn't tell them my name, what year I was born, who was President, etc. I remember none of this. I do remember getting an MRI at the ER and then having the doctors tell me I had a brain tumor. I think this was a good way to find out. Because everything was still kind of fuzzy, it just became a part of my reality immediately. I was then transferred to Piedmont Hospital in Atlanta where I stayed for nearly a week. After a battery of tests (another MRI, CT scan, mammogram, ultrasound, X-rays) the doctors didn't discover any other tumors so the brain tumor is considered primary. That's good but unfortunately after a PAINFUL biopsy they learned the tumor is malignant. And, it's inoperable because of its location. So I will begin a six-week round of radiation this week along with a six-month round of chemotherapy. Fortunately the chemo is an oral therapy (pill) so I don't have to be poked and prodded for that.

It's important to get started with treatment right away but I will be seeking out second opinions. I mean if I can shop around for shoes, I can shop around for neurologists and oncologists.

However, I really like my radiation oncologist. He told me while this is a serious and life-threatening situation, I have several things on my side -- I'm only 35, I'm otherwise healthy, I have a positive attitude and I am prayerful. I also have so many others praying for me and I can feel the power from that, really! My doc is also a man of faith himself so I like to have God's partners working with me. One of my other doctors is named Timothy McDonald -- the same name as my pastor! He's also super friendly and stopped by my hospital room several times just to say hi and give me a hug of encouragement.

For now my days will be filled with doctors appointments, daily walks, blog posts, prayers and lots of love. I cannot work or drive which will be really hard for me because I'm a pretty independent gal. However, I know God would not put more on me than I can handle. As one my friends always tells me "the load may be heavy but it's the weight that makes you stronger!"

I thank God today for the love and support of my family and friends, for feeling good (you'd never know I have a brain tumor) and for everyone who's called, emailed and visited me.

Love to all!
Chanda
Isaiah 40:31
"But they that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint"